Page 53 of My One and Only

Ah. She saw where he was going. “Like she was devastated when her mother died?”

Cam shoved a hand through his short, dark hair but didn’t meet her eyes. “Yes. Exactly.”

“Not quite the same, Cam,” Jo said immediately. “I’m not her mother. She just met me. We did homework together and read a book. That’s it.”

“I don’t want her to get attached to you. You’re leaving soon. She’ll feel abandoned.”

“Really, Cam? She’ll be devastated when a woman she’s known for a few weeks leaves? I don’t think so.”

“Of course she will be. You’re someone new. Someone different. Someone paying attention to her.”

“Listen to yourself, Cam. It sounds like she never meets anyone new. Anyone different.” She leaned toward him, holding his gaze. “Does she ever have friends from school over here? Or does she ever go to a friend’s house to play?”

“Of course not.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’m not here after school. And I don’t want to ask my mom to do extra work.”

“It would actually be less work for your mom. Fiona and her friend would play together. Your mom wouldn’t have to focus all her attention on Fiona. And if Fiona had friends over, their mothers would ask Fiona to come play at her house.”

“Exactly. And I don’t want…” He looked away from Jo. His throat rippled as he swallowed.

“What don’t you want, Cam?”Jo asked softly. She put her hand on his arm. “You don’t want her to have friends? Go to someone’s house after school? Have someone over to her house?”

He looked away, his jaw working.

Jo squeezed his arm. “That’s how it works, Cam,” she said. “That’s how kids make friends. And kids her ageneedfriends. Hasn’t she ever said anything to you about that?”

He avoided her gaze. Swallowed, but didn’t answer. Which meant Fionahadasked about friends.

“I get that losing your wife, Fiona losing her mom, was awful. Traumatic. But you can’t let that define your life. If you don’t let Fiona do what other kids her age do, you’re going to damage her. She’ll have a hard time making friends when she’s older. She’ll be excluded from the cliques and the friend groups. Is that what you want?”

“Of course not.”

“Then why are you trying to shrink wrap her and keep her in this house with you? Why aren’t you trying to find friends for her?”

“You didn’t see her when Ashley died,” he said. “She stood in the window for hours, watching for her mommy to come home. And of course Ashley never did. Couldn’t.”

“Did you explain to her that her mother had died?”

He looked away from her. “I told her Ashley had gone away.”

Jo wanted to roll her eyes, instead, she grabbed the front of Cam’s shirt and forced him to look at her. “You’re an idiot, Cam. Ofcourseshe was looking for Ashley to come back if she thought she’d just gone away. Ofcourseshe wondered where her mommy was.”

“Was I supposed to tell her that her mommy had died?”

“Yes! You should have told her that her mommy was in heaven. You shouldn’t have let her believe there was a chance Ashley was coming home.” Jo slumped back on the couch. “I thought you were a smart guy, Cam. But you sure handled this like a complete dumbass.”

“Sorry,” he said, his voice tight. “She’s my daughter. I’m doing what I think is best.”

“Did you ever take her to a therapist after Ashley died?”

“Of course not! She was only three!”

“Then maybe you should have gone yourself, so you could get some help with helping Fiona. I think you’re making a huge mistake, and I think you’ll come to regret it. I think you still have time to change things, but you need to get moving.” Jo swallowed the lump in her throat at the picture Cam was drawing of Fiona’s life. “Do you have any idea how isolated you’ve made her? How you’ve cut her off from normal… normallife?”

When Cam didn’t answer, Jo stood up. “I’m going to bed. I’ve already checked and all the doors and windows are locked. Don’t close your door tonight, or Fiona’s. My door will be open as well. I’ll see you in the morning, Cam.”