Page 35 of Redemption

You can do this.

I tell myself one more time before readjusting the tie on my robe and opening the bathroom door.

I find Kilian sitting on the edge of the bed. His elbows on his knees and a sadness on his face. “I’m sorry, Bella. I shouldn’t have said that. Not that way.”

I cross my arms and lean into the doorway. “I left you. You were free to sleep with whomever you wanted.”

“Yeah, but I don’t need to tell you about it.”

I shrug. “We never planned to see each other again, Kilian, so I have no claim over you. You can sleep with whatever women you wish.”

He sighs as he runs his hands through his hair. “When you left…”

“We weren’t in a relationship, Kilian.” I cut him off but know my words will cut deeper. It’s the truth though. We weren’t together, not really. We fucked for almost two years. Our relationship consisted of whiskey and late nights, silk and secrets. But we never considered ourselves in a relationship. We were two people looking for a release.

“You know it was more than what you are making it out to be.”

I snort. “Says the man in one of the largest international crime organizations. Is that what you were really doing all those times you were in Dublin? Doing whatever it is you do instead of telling me you were there to see your sick grandmother?”

I watch his fists clench before he snaps his eyes up at me. “And what were you doing there? Trying to find secrets for your family. Lying to my face the whole time.”

“And you weren’t?” I snap.

He stands and I can’t help but take in his perfect form. The tattoos that cover his shoulders and chest that lead down to his six-pack. The man is lean but all muscle. My eyes drop further to the vee leading to his favorite part of his body. I’m so busy studying him that I don’t see him lift his arm. He grabs my chin in a strong hold. “So you were working for them then and now?”

“What?” I ask, forgetting what the hell we were arguing about.

“How long have you been working for them, Mirabella?”

I wince at the sound of my real name on his lips. “I’ve never worked for them. Not in Dublin and not now.”

“Then why did you leave?”

I close my eyes. “Please, Kilian, anything but that.” I can’t tell him. Not now. Who knows if I ever will. I can’t let him know about Aria. Now with the risk as great as it is between our two worlds.

He drops my chin but grabs my hips, pulling me into him. “I searched for you, Bella. I spent three years trying to find you. I swear I went crazy looking for you. My friend, Bastian, called me a fool. He said if you didn’t want to be found you wouldn’t be. I paid one of my men a lot of money but even he couldn’t find you. He can find anyone.”

“How did you find me in Cefalù then?”

“I didn’t. I was looking for your brother.” He lifts my chin. “Seeing you again woke something in me, Bella. It reminded me of the man I used to be. The one I was with you all those years ago. Don’t ever downplay what we had back then. Because we might not have called it what it was but you know what it was.” His forehead falls to mine. “You know.”

A tear crests my eye. I hate how this man brings out so many emotions in me. “For what it’s worth, I didn’t want to leave. It wasn’t my choice.”

“Your family?” he asks, pulling back and looking into my eyes.

I nod. “They forced me back to Italy. I-I ran to Dublin. I felt like it was so far from home. I remember going there as a kid with my parents and staying in a castle. I thought it was so magical. When they died, when my uncle became my guardian, I wanted nothing more than to get away.” I rest my head against Kilian’s chest as he pulls me into him. His chin lands on my head as his hand trails up and down my back. “It was the nicest Giancarlo has ever been to me. He let me go there after I begged and pleaded. I wanted to study—”

“Languages.”

I tilt my head up at Kilian. “You remember?”

“I remember every one of our nights in Dublin. Including those where I watched your naked ass on my bed as you studied.”

“You distracted me. A lot. I wouldn’t call it studying.”

His fingers leave a trail of chills down my back until he reaches my ass and squeezes. “I couldn’t get enough of you.”

“Thank goodness you finally brought me those robes or I would have failed out of school.”

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