Page 84 of In Italy for Love

Slamming the boot wasn’t as satisfying as she’d hoped and she turned for the station mixed-up and lost. Why was she going again?

‘Are you going to say goodbye?’ The indignation in Alex’s tone made her whirl around.

‘I don’t want to!’ She watched him trying to make sense of her words, his brow twisting and his mouth opening to speak words that wouldn’t come. ‘I don’t want to say goodbye at all.’

‘I thought you didn’t like being dependent on me.’

‘I didn’t like being dependent on Luca.’ Her vision narrowed. Planting her feet in front of him, she licked her lips and allowed the words to tumble out. ‘Ask me to stay.’

He drew up straight, his expression going blank in surprise. ‘What?’

Her jaw wobbled as she repeated herself. ‘Ask me to stay.’ Cold seeped along her skin as she began to suspect that she’d made a difficult situation worse by pushing him. But if she’d already made it worse, she might as well continue. ‘Ask me!’ she said again. ‘I’ll say yes. Just ask me!’

Her vision blurred with tears as the shock creeping over his face made her confront the truth. He wasn’t going to ask her. He was content to keep her in the pages of a book where she couldn’t hurt him.

‘Your flight is tonight!’

Her eyes slammed shut, and in her mind his voice twisted until it sounded like Luca.Be reasonable, Jules. ‘You’re right. It was a stupid idea.’ She headed for the station, only daring to open her eyes when he was safely behind her.

‘Jules, wait!’

His footsteps behind her triggered a twinge of panic and she hurried for the station. Missing the train was one complication she didn’t need on top of confusion and rejection and failure – at least that was the excuse her pride came up with.

‘Iwantto ask you!’

She paused, the automatic doors swishing open as though encouraging her to take the next steps and leave him behind. ‘But?’ she prompted, stupidly hoping there wouldn’t be a ‘but’.

‘But what if it doesn’t work? It’s not fair to ask so much of you. I can’t be responsible for you?—’

‘It was stupid of me to suggest it,’ she called over her shoulder. She wanted to hit something. Why did she keep hanging around too long instead of making the necessary break?

‘No, it was brave?—’

‘I know you’re not ready. I never meant to get my hopes up, and Iespeciallydidn’t mean to push you.’ Forgetting she was supposed to be protecting herself, she turned back and caught sight of him, this gorgeous man who put old accordions back together but couldn’t do himself the same service. The flash of his blue eyes reminded her of the day they’d met, when she’d had no clue of what he would come to mean to her, but she’d sensed the magic already. ‘You don’t have to feel guilty. No expectations, remember?’

‘I’m struggling with that.’

Before she could process what he could mean, he gripped her cardigan and tugged her closer, reminding her of the many other occasions he’d done the same. Her gaze dipped to his mouth, her breath catching.

But instead of pressing close for one more mind-blowing kiss that she wouldn’t have trusted herself to stop, his shoulders drooped – and her heart wilted.

‘I’ll miss you,’ he whispered.

That was safe – and it was true, even though ‘missing him’ didn’t begin to cover the breadth of her regret. ‘I’ll miss you too.’

With a pained expression, he pulled away, his fist still clamped around her cardigan. ‘Text me when you land. I’ll be worried.’

‘I will,’ she promised. ‘Send me pictures of Arco – and Attila.’

The way his expression softened when she mentioned her dog only made her want to protest her departure more loudly. ‘Okay.’

For a long moment, he just looked at her and a hopeless smile stretched on her lips.

Lifting a hand to his face, she brushed his cheek and ran her hand over his mouth one last time. ‘Goodbye, Alessandro Mattelig.’I love you.

The sudden hiss of a train startled her and she stumbled as she tried to shake herself back into the present.

‘I should?—’

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