Page 17 of The Probability of Us

“Are you kidding me?” She cuts me off again, louder this time. I shush her and grab her arm to pull her further away from Warren who’s moving to wait for his coffee. “Did he explain why he left? Did you talk about anything?”

I drop my gaze. “I stopped him before we could get that far. I was too scared to hear what he might say so I just said we’ll be professional while he’s here.”

She’s shaking her head, exasperated. “I can tell you right now, that’s not going to happen.”

“What do you mean?” I say, hurt by her casual dismissal of my plan.

“What I mean is, you might say it’s only professional, but he showed up here this morning with blue tulips like he always used to, and you still look at him like he’s your sun. That’s not keeping it professional.”

My face falls because she’s right. I don’t know if we’ll be able to pull off professional.

“You have bigger things to worry about today, though,” she says, and I nod. My gaze drops; I can’t look at him. He doesn’t know what today is because he wasn’t here for it. That reminder keeps my thoughts in check. “Call me if you need me. If not, I’ll see you tomorrow after work?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there.” I reach out and squeeze her hand as an answer to the other comment. Ali has been my rock though the past five years. She held my hand through the funeral, held me as I cried when I realized I’d lost two parents even though only one of them died, and has dropped everything to show up for me when I needed it.

“What’s happening tomorrow?” Warren rejoins the group with a smile, and Ali and I look at each other wide-eyed, silently trying to figure out how to get out of this.

His smile turns to a smirk, and I know then he knows exactly what’s happening tomorrow—we’ve been going to the same bar for eight years, we’re predictable—but he wants us to invite him.

When we don’t say anything, he adds, “You know I’ve been thinking about checking out The Dizzy Acorn while I’m in town, maybe tomorrow would be a good day for it.”

I groan and roll my eyes. “You’re impossible. Yes, we’re going to The Dizzy Acorn tomorrow.” I glance back at Ali and she’s frowning. But hanging out with the group is better than being alone with him again . . . right? I shrug at her, and she sighs as if in acceptance that this is going to happen one way or another. “You’re welcome to come, although I can’t promise people will be happy to see you.”

Ali tries to cover her laugh with a cough but Warren has the good sense to look hesitant about accepting, although he still does.

“I have an early meeting,” Ali says, “but it was nice to see you, Warren.”

“You too.” He smiles. “I’m looking forward to Wednesday.”

Ali just looks at me one last time before heading out the door and leaving me with the one person I want to be with, and the one person I shouldn’t be around.

* * *

“Oh, these are for you.” He hands me the flowers on the walk to the office. I take them reluctantly, acting as if I’m doing him a favor by taking them off his hands but I get butterflies when his fingers barely graze against mine. “I survived a warzone trying to get these.”

I laugh despite myself. “I take it Lola remembered you and wasn’t happy?”

“That’s an understatement.” He shivers and I laugh again. “You might not think of flowers as dangerous, but she sure knows how to weaponize them. I had thorny stems thrown at me, and she yelled something about how she hopes one of them poisons me, so there’s that. I almost had a heart attack when she grabbed the shears.”

The first time I went into Lola’s to get the flowers on my own, Lola asked what happened and has held a grudge against Warren for it. She’s the kind of little, old lady who doesn’t forget anything either.

“Are you smirking at my pain?” He nudges me with his elbow.

“I can’t deny that injuring you is a thought that’s crossed my mind many times.” I smile at his gaping expression. “It’d be nice if someone else did it for me.”

“Okay, I probably deserve it from you.” We stop at an intersection, waiting for a walk signal. “I’ll give you one hit. I won’t even try to block it.” He pats his bicep and my eyes strain to see every detail his suit jacket is trying to cover. “Come on, I can take it.”

“I’m not going to hit you,” I whisper, looking around at all the people watching us. The signal changes and I push his arm to get him to keep walking. His arms feel bigger, stronger than the last time I held them. My hand clenches by my side so I don’t reach out to touch him again.

“At least, not when you’re expecting it,” I add, just loud enough for him to hear. I laugh when he glances over, trying to figure out if I’m joking or serious.

I don’t know what the answer is either though.

When we get to the office, Peter, Mac, and Jason are in the lobby waiting for the elevator. Jason greets me with a tight smile but only greets Warren with a frown. Peter and Mac are looking at each other with small smiles, almost as if they’re silently communicating.

“I hope it wasn’t too hard to find your way here,” I say, since Jason isn’t being a good host.

“Yes, Clara showed us around before dropping us off last night.” Peter smiles. “It’s a beautiful town.”

---