Page 105 of Knot That Difficult

He’s getting on my nerves again.

“Okay,” I snap. “You don’t just get to play the martyr in all this.That’syour apology? You’re you couldn’t control us better?”

Ben frowns. “No, that’s not what I’m saying?—”

“How about apologizing for punching me in the fucking face? Why don’t you start there?”

Connor looks at me and scowls. “Ace?—”

“You want to apologize for shattering my oven door?” Ben spits.

“You were in between me and mymate.”

“You bit her in aparking garage.”

A low growl sounds in my throat, but Connor grabs my wrist.

“Both of you.Stop,” he commands. “This endsnow.”

There’s a moment of silence, and Connor sighs. “Look,” he says. “None of us have a time machine. We can’t go back and change what happened with Devyn. The facts are, we’re all bonded to her now. We can move forward and figure out what to do, or we can argue back and forth and be miserable the entire time and make no progress. I, for one, don’t have the fucking energy for that. I doubt either of you do.”

Ben rubs at his face. “I don’t,” he murmurs.

Connor looks at me, and I shake my head.

“For what it’s worth,” Ben adds, “I did want to apologize for punching you, too. That’s not how I want any of this to go. I know you don’t particularly like me, but we’re in this together. If Devyn wants you, that’s enough for me to try with you.”

Well, now Ben is making me look like an asshole, being all righteous and shit.

Damn it.

“Well, now at least I have someone to play video games with,” I grunt. “But you don’t get to fucking judge me, from now on. The minute you saw me, you looked at me like I was a piece of shit. I don’t have the same background as the two of you.” I motion to Connor and him. “I’m not privileged, okay? I had to do shit I’m not proud of to get here.”

Ben nods. “I know that.”

I glare at him. “Doyou know that, though? Because you judged the shit out of me for no fucking reason.”

“Yeah, I did,” he admits. “My first thought was Devyn, and if you were safe for her. She’s always my first priority, especially now.”

Every time he says her name, the nausea comes back. My skin itches, and for the thousandth time, I have to tell myself it’s not a good idea to go to her.

“I want what’s best for her, and what’s best for her is for us to get along,” Ben adds. “I want to start over, if that’s possible.” He nods to Connor. “I’ve always liked you.” Then he turns to me. “Devyn likes you enough that she had you bite her first. That’s something that will probably always mess with me. She had been asking me to bite her for months, and I always said no. Then you did it, and it…fucked with me. I was jealous, and shitty, and I’m sorry.”

Even at Ben’s worst moments, when he’s obviously being tortured by being away from his mate, he’s still agoodperson.

He’s still better than me, and that’s what makes me snap.

Connor grips my wrist. “Ace,” he says. “Calm down.”

I look at my boyfriend incredulously. “Calmdown? We’ve got Mister Fucking Perfect over here, and you want me tocalm down?”

Ben laughs bitterly. “Perfect? Seriously?”

I motion to him. “Yeah. Perfect boyfriend, dutiful detective. Apologizing and everything.”

“Fine,” Ben snaps. “Yes, I’m a nice guy, and I’m polite, and I’m usually patient. Yeah, I’m agoodperson. Isn’t that why you fell in love with him?” He looks to Connor.

I remain silent, narrowing my eyes.

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