Page 97 of Knot That Difficult

“Holy shit,” Skylar says. “Are they writing fanfiction about you?”

April elbows her, and I clutch the letters tightly to my chest, treasuring them.

My stomach flips.

What could they possibly have written to me and in such little time?

I cherish every holiday and birthday card someone gives me. I love the little notes they write, even if it’s something as simple ashappy birthday.

I especially love thank-you cards.

But these?

What I hold in my hands is more precious than anything I’ve ever owned, besides the friendship bracelet April gave me.

This is tangible proof that I’m cared for.

“This is amazing, Dev,” Skylar says sincerely. “You didn’t even break up, and they’re doing this for you!”

I shake my head. “I can’t break up with them. I just don’t know how to move forward.”

April hands me another present. “What if you read the letters tonight, and then decide what to do from there? You’ll eventually have to talk to them, and I don’t want you getting sicker than you are.”

I frown. “I’m not sick.”

Skylar cocks her head. “You’re purposely apart from your pack after a mating bond. Even if you’re not physically ill, you have the psychological effects. You’re not eating enough, and I doubt you’re sleeping properly.”

I don’t. Even though I slept for more than fourteen hours today, I dream of nothing but seeing my pack,over and over. I would wake up with a jolt, remember I’m not with them, then fall back into a fitful sleep.

“Frankly, I’m surprised you’re not vomiting nonstop or have a fever,” Tammy adds, bending down to press a hand to my forehead. “Ben’s over ten minutes away, and that’s far enough that you could make yourself seriously ill.”

Ben.

At the mention of his name, I look to the plush Wilson that sits on Tammy’s coffee table and recall our anniversary.

I was so ready to have him bite me then, even though I hadn’t found my pack.

And now that he’s bitten me, why am I hiding?

Why do I feel so terrible about what happened?

“I haven’t talked to him in days,” I whisper.

“Oh, Dev,” Skylar says softly. “That must be so hard for you.”

Tears fill my eyes. “Yeah. I miss him a lot.”

“I don’t think you have to punish yourself anymore,” April adds. “You don’t deserve to suffer, Dev. We all want you happy. From what you’ve told us, you’ve fought for your happiness your whole life. There’s no need to deprive yourself of it now, not when you have three men that love you.”

I turn to look at her, no longer staring at the present in my hand. “You think Connor and Ace love me?”

I know Ben does, but the two Alphas?

Skylarsnorts.“There is no way you just asked that! Please, there isno way.”

I frown at her. “Weren’t you the one that thought you were unlovable for, like, ayear?”

Skylar and April both went through horrible events last year, and I know for a fact Skylar had a lot of moments where she thought she didn’t deserve a pack.

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