Page 107 of Defend Me

I slipped into a bathroom and fucked with my hair the best I could, then flipped it up and down a la head banging rockstar. It was a mess, but in a sexy way. I was about to put it up, but I realized that I didn’t have my hair tie. What had that fucker done with it?

I stared at myself in the mirror. Nothing bad would happen if I had it down. Tilian liked it this way.

As I reached for the door, I looked again. If a professor saw me, would I seem unprofessional? They might consider me some troublemaker because I had long hair and was wearing skinny jeans. Plus, I was leaving a party.

I quickly searched the drawers, but I didn’t find anything that I could tie it back with. My fingers flexed, then straightened at my sides.

With a growl, I decided there was nothing for it. I held onto my shoes as I made my way down the stairs so that I wouldn’t make noise and draw attention. When I passed the kitchen, I locked eyes with none other than Lincoln.

His head cocked. Oof. With a grimace, I hurried out of the house.

I checked my phone, but it was dead. Immediately, I wondered if my mom had tried to call me again. She’d been doing it a few times a day, but I couldn’t deal with it right now, maybe ever. My head still wasn’t entirely stable and I was fixing that, but she’d find a way to tear everything down.

She could wait. Better yet, she could fuck off for a while and let me be a goddamn college student.

I tried not to think about the fact that Tilian had left. While I drove, I recalled what we’d talked about last night. I didn’t think it was anything that would freak him out. Maybe the whole situation freaked him out.

I should’ve made him think about it more. He’d gone all in, but he was also tipsy. I’d drawn the line at kissing and now I wondered if even that had been too much to allow.

Not able to help myself, I stopped at the campus. I ran my fingers through my hair, wishing I could put it up. There was probably a hair tie somewhere in my car, but I didn’t take the time to check. All that really mattered right now was finding the little shit who abandoned me sometime in the night. That was a move for one-night stands or leaving your spouse under cover of darkness so they’ll never find you.

I was neither of those things and I refused to be reduced to them.

I jogged all the way to Tilian’s room and knocked on the door. Minutes passed without it opening. I knocked again, louder this time in case he was sleeping. I didn’t care if I woke him up. We could go back to sleep together.

Jesus, I felt clingy. I guess that was what happened when I let myself like someone for the first time, especially this much.

If he was home, he wasn’t going to answer the door, so I headed back to the parking lot. My mood was steadily pitching downward as I drove back to my apartment. Since my phone was dead, I couldn’t text him until I got home.

After I parked, I closed my eyes and tried to manifest some good energy in the hopes that the universe would free me from all the bad karma I’d racked up. I needed a win. I needed Tilian.

My eyes were heavy as I rode the elevator. I’d only slept a couple of hours, but I wasn’t confident that I’d be able to relax when I got inside.

I stepped into the hallway and yawned. After scrubbing my hands down my face, I turned left, then froze.

He was here, sitting on the floor in front of my apartment. I seriously contemplated whether I was hallucinating.

Fuck that. He was here. I rushed forward and dropped into a crouch in front of him. Taking his face in my hands, I looked into his blue eyes.

“What’s going on?” I asked.

“I was waiting for you.”

He sounded timid and his eyes were searching my face.

“How long have you been here?”

“Like, an hour.”

“Why?”

The corner of his mouth lifted. “To sit in the hall and stare at the paint, obviously. I texted you.”

“My phone’s dead. I went to your dorm and when you didn’t answer, I thought…”

“Hey,” he said gently, putting his hands over mine. “I’m right here.”

“But why’d you leave?”

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