Page 39 of The Bookshop at the Cornish Cove

‘Mum, Dad, Nancy? Anyone home?’

‘Dan, what are you doing here?’

My brother came bumbling into the kitchen with a holdall slung over his shoulder. That wasn’t a good sign.

‘Hey, sis, how are you doing?’ he asked. He then noticed Dennie. ‘Oh, hello. Interrupting something, was I?’ He grinned.

‘Hey, I’m Dennis.’ He offered Dan his hand. ‘You must be Dan. I’ve heard a lot about you.’

‘Oh, soyou’reDennis. Been hearing about you from Mum.’

‘All good I hope.’

‘Well, that’s a matter of opinion really.’

I looked away, totally embarrassed, not wanting Dennie to think that we’d been talking about him. We actually hadn’t. No one had really mentioned his name out loud since he’d gone. His loss just wasn’t acknowledged by any of us, even though I had felt it so deeply.

I grabbed the dustpan and brush from the cupboard under the sink and started to sweep away the mess from the broken crockery.

‘Coffee smells good, Nancy. Got one for your bro?’

I grabbed more cups from the cupboard and with shaky hands still, poured us all a drink, then added milk and handed them out.

‘So, what brings you home, Dan?’

‘Guess!’

‘Sabrina kicked you out again? What have you done to piss her off this time?’

‘Nothing – again. Well, apart from living and breathing of course.’

‘Dan, you can’t let her keep doing this. You’re worth more than this.’

‘Oh, it’ll be fine again after a couple of days on her own. She just needs her space.’

‘But that’s not how relationships work. She can’t just kick you out every time she feels like it. You need to stand up to her more.’

‘Can’t. She scares the shit out of me.’

Dennie laughed.

‘Don’t laugh. It’s not funny, Dennis. She’s been doing this to him for years, then we’re expected to pick up the pieces every time. She’ll take him back and it’ll be all hunky-dory for the next few months until the next time she wakes up in a bad mood.’

‘She can’t help it.’ My big brother looked so dejected and sad that it broke another little piece of my heart. Like it did every time this behaviour repeated itself.

‘You deserve better, Daniel.’

‘I love her,’ he whispered.

‘You’re a fool and that’s not love.’

‘Well, you’re a fine one to talk. Look at you. You’ve never been in love in your life so how do you think you’re so qualified to tell me what to do? I’d rather be with someone than on my own and too scared to love. Like you are.’

‘And why do you think that is, Dan? Do you think you’re a good example to follow? Do you think I want to be caught up in a relationship like yours? I’d like to think I’m worth more than that.’

‘Yeah, and that’s why you’re on your own, like a sad sap.’

I hadn’t known Dennie for long and I didn’t like that Dan was taking the mickey out of me in front of him. It felt particularly awkward. I felt like Dennie liked me for the me that I was around him and not for the me that I really was. The sad sap that my brother knew I was.

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