Page 55 of The Bookshop at the Cornish Cove

‘It’s good to see you laugh again, kid.’

‘You too, bro.’

‘It feels good too. I feel like I’ve been existing in my life and not really living it the way I want to.’

A flash of inspiration suddenly hit me and I gasped out loud.

‘Ooh! I’ve had an idea.’

‘You and your ideas. What madcap plan have you come up with now?’

‘Why don’t we write a list of all the things we want to do? Like a vision for our future?’

‘Like those old vision boards you always used to do?’

‘Yeah, the same sort of thing. Only we write them down.’

‘God, I never write down the things I think. Someone might read them.’

‘OK, so write like no one is ever going to read them. In fact, you don’t even have to tell me what’s on the paper. You can throw it in the fire if you like. This is about you and exploring your innermost hopes and dreams.’

‘We could, and I really like the sound of that, but I don’t think there’s any paper or pens around.’

‘I’m the owner of a bookshop that sells stationery. Like I go anywhere without pads and paper.’

He laughed at me and messed up my hair.

I grinned as I went into my room and grabbed what we needed.

‘OK, so let’s set a timer for twenty minutes and see what we can come up with when we put our brains under pressure. Nointerruptions. Write down anything, even if it’s completely mad. In fact, the madder the better. Then we can share anything we want at the end, but no pressure. That sound OK? Ready?’

He nodded his affirmation.

‘Go…’

For the next twenty minutes, we both alternated between staring into the forest and frantically writing down our thoughts, and when the timer on my phone went off, we both breathed out loudly at exactly the same time and laughed at the similarity between us. Like peas in a pod as Mum and Dad have always said.

‘Right, let’s get a bottle of wine open and share away,’ Dan said, a smile on his face. ‘I’m actually excited andwouldlike to share what I’ve written with you. Shit, sis, that was liberating to write with the freedom of not worrying about what Sabrina would think.’

I had a feeling it might be. It was something I did from time to time. I did journal every day, but normally about my daily feelings rather than my hopes and dreams: all the plans for the shop for the unforeseeable future with Dennie – I had the shop parts nailed down, but I needed to do more in the rest of my life – thinking about how, if I was going to save the planet, I was going to do that, but also, thinking about what I wanted in my personal life. I’d had a taste of love and I needed to consider whether I wanted to risk having my heart broken again or whether I would continue on my own forever, not trusting anyone to keep it safe.

It turned out that Dan’s first item on his list was to do more water-based hobbies. After all, what was the point in living by the sea if you never went in it? He’d always loved it as a kid. It probably wasn’t the wisest time of year to start this as a new hobby, with the sea getting colder by the day, but he said thathe’d be happy to buy himself a wetsuit and risk it for the rush he felt when he was younger.

The second thing was that he wanted to start his own business. He’d always been brilliant with his hands, excelling at all of those practical lessons at school, like woodwork and design and technology. The furniture he’d made for me at the shop was always getting compliments and I was pretty sure that he’d have a really successful business. And now that I’d learned so much from Dennie, I knew I could help him. He said that he’d mooted the idea to Sabrina in the past and she’d insisted that he stayed in his job, because it paid him a regular wage and she didn’t want him to take any risks. But now that I was loving what I was doing so much, he said he was inspired to do the same.

I was absolutely delighted for him and proud of him for making such a momentous decision. He’d make it awesome. There was a little bit of me wishing that Dennie and he could work on this together, but maybe he could ask for his help. Just because Dennie and I weren’t going to have a future together, it didn’t mean that my brother and he couldn’t be friends.

The third thing was that he wanted a dog. He’s always wanted one but Sabrina said that she wouldn’t have dog hairs in her house or her house stinking of smelly mutt. I’d only been to their place a couple of times, but you had to take your shoes off outside because she wouldn’t let a shoe that had been outside over the threshold, and she insisted on everyone washing their hands before they touched anything. She was never a person to relax. Dan said she was always dressed in her designer clothes even if she was just lounging around the house and insisted on having the most expensive of everything. He felt like he’d been working to pay for her luxuries.

But now, he’d decided to find himself a doggy mate and go for long wonderful walks in the woods and play catch on the beach.

I was loving his list and, more than that, his lust for life. I think the last few days had got him finally doing things he wanted to do, rather than things that he wastoldhe wanted to do, and experiencing life for himself. I loved this new version of my brother. He was fun and was finally excited about what the future for him might hold.

‘So, what’s on your list, Nance?’

‘Nothing as exciting as yours, I have to say. I’ve got that I want to make part of the shop a recycling centre and that I want to do more locally in educating the people of Driftwood Bay about recycling, reusing and repurposing. It’s something I’ve always wanted to do and I’d like to go into local nurseries and schools and get the children on board right from a very early age. They’re the future and we need everyone to think differently.’

‘You’d be great at that.’

---