Page 58 of After Our Kiss

“You just said to go. You didn't say where.”

“I meant your room and you know that.”

Her hip kicked to one side, emphasizing the drastic dip of her middle. My hands buzzed at the thought of fitting there so perfectly. “That's not fair, you're assuming I know what you want without you saying it clearly.”

The pulsing in my body stalled. “Don't you?” I wondered out loud. Georgia's face tilted down, her eyes hidden in the dim hallway. This whole house was crawling with shadows. Even when we were forced together, they still let us hide what we really desired.

She started to walk away. I closed my hand on her shoulder. “Wait,” I said. “You're right. I don't want you to go to your room.” My fingers tightened on her soft skin. “Let's go to mine.”

****

I'd been staying upstairs. I had a view of the ocean through the gaps in the wooden boards on my window. Lonnie was on the same floor, but down the opposite hall. We didn't have to sleep near each other in this huge house and we took advantage of that.

Georgia stared around as we entered. “Nice,” she said. It wasn't—it was a single bed with thick blankets, a chair with my jacket draped on it. One wall had a dusty dresser that was barren. It was the opposite of fucking nice.

Yet... with her in here with me, it wasn't so bad.

She must have felt my stare, because she spun around, squinting. “You get blankets, but not me.”

“I told you why.”

“How do I make you understand I won't do anything to hurt myself?”

Sighing, I sat on the bed. “Alright. I'll get you a blanket.”

“I could also sleep here.”

My eyes flashed at her. The idea of sleeping with her curled against me, my hands able to touch her whenever I ached to, was tempting.Stop getting close to her. You can't keep her.“No,” I said, channeling what ice was left in my blood.

“What? Why not?”

“Because you're my prisoner.”

She backed up from the force of my claim. “I thought—”

“You think you're free,” I growled, standing again. Gripping her by her hair, I pushed her roughly onto the blankets. The pent up frustration at being between a rock and a hard place had gotten to me. “You think I want you.”

Amazingly, when she knelt and faced me, she lacked any hint of terror. I knew I was frightening. I didn't know where her strength came from. “What do you want, then, if it's not me? What would truly make you happy?”

Grasping the front of my shirt, I traced the obvious scar beneath. I palmed the old injuries on my arms, the ink I'd covered myself with because choosing to experience pain instead of having it forced on me was intoxicating. Surreal.

I touched myself to see if I really existed. The lack of hate in her eyes made me think I had to be invisible. How else could Georgia not wish death on me with every glance? “What would make me happy,” I said, choking up, “Is if I could erase my existence. It's the only way to make sure this moment never happens to you.”

Her pretty mouth made an ugly shape. “What?”

“Have you looked around?” I asked. “You're my slave, Georgia. And soon you'll be my father's.” I quivered, and as if picturing her out of my life, I gripped her forearms and dug in until she winced. But she didn't buckle. “My life equals your suffering.”

“Being with you isn't suffering!” she cried.

“No? You mean youlikethis?” I loomed over her, watching how she did her best not to crumble under my ferocity. “You wouldn't change things if you could?”

“I—I would. Of course I would.” She gathered herself. “I'd go back and make sure you ran awaywithme.”

I locked up at her words. “What?”

“That day, when you told me to never look back, I listened. Did you know that's my biggest regret?”

I released her as if she burned. “You don't know what you're saying.”

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