Page 36 of Claiming What's Mine

“I can't live like this anymore. I haven't seen you in over two months since that night in the barn. You haven't been looking out your bedroom window, you ignore me if you see me in town. Why? Did I do something wrong?”

“You didn't do anything wrong, Jay, it's just—”

“It's just what?” I said loudly, holding out my arms wide. “We sleep together one time, your father tears you away, and I get no answers? How long is this going to go on for?”

Letting her arms fall to her sides, her lids lowered. “You know what my father said, what do you think he'll do if he finds us together again?”

I didn't answer. It hurt to think that her father could have that much power over us. We loved each other, that was all that should matter, but he couldn't see what we felt.

Shaking her head, she frowned. “There's nothing I can do about it. I have to respect him, I have to respect what he says. It's the right thing to do, that's what a good daughter does, that's what my faith wants.” Blue's chin fell against her chest as she closed her eyes.

“What about what you want?” Gripping her chin between my thumb and forefinger, I forced her head back up. “When do you get a say in what makes you happy?”

We were different, born different, raised different, but we did share one thing; neither of us were given a choice.

I didn't choose to be who I was. I didn't choose to live this life. I didn't have a voice in any of it.

And neither did she.

Her eyes fluttered in the sockets as they darted back and forth over mine. Parting her lips, I thought she was going to kiss me. I waited for it, I watched her as she licked her lips and swallowed softly.

But that kiss never came.

Turning her head away, she said, “It doesn't matter, I can't come with you.” Blue closed her mouth, letting out a heavy breath, and taking a long step back. “I'm sorry, Jay, you need to go.” With her hand on the door, she started to close it.

Why are you giving up so easily?

This isn't what you want!

Throwing out my arm, I stopped her, refusing to let her give up on us. “We love each other, we can do this, Blue, you and me, we don't need anyone else. Come with me, we can be together, we can do this.” With an open palm, I kept the door open.

Fight for us, Blue bird, fight for us.

Her mouth twisted and turned as she rolled her lip under the edge of her teeth. There was a long pause from her, and it seemed like she was thinking so hard about what she should do. The answer was simple to me; we do anything to be together. We run away if we have to.

Please, you know what you want.

“I can't. I'm sixteen, Jayden, my father would have you arrested.” Her eyes glossed over, filling with tears. “I can't go with you, I'm sorry, I can't do this anymore.”

“Do what?”

“This,” she said, flicking a finger between us. “It's over, Jayden—we're over.”

“Blue, don't do this. I'll wait if you won't come with me now. I don't want to go without you. I love you, Blue.”

“It's over, Jayden.” My hand slipped down the door as Blue closed it in my face.

I could hear the lock as she flipped it and her feet as she walked away. But my mind couldn't process the words that came out of her mouth.

We had always talked about being together forever, about growing old together, about creating a life that was ours and ours alone.

Suddenly, that was all gone, torn into pieces before my eyes as she broke up with me. It felt like she had reached into my chest tore out my heart. My chest ached, the muscle barely beating behind my ribs.

I needed her to live, I needed Blue to survive. She was the only thing that had been stable in my world, the only one to push me when I needed it, to support me when no one else would.

Blue was the other half of me, she was the force that kept me breathing, that kept me going.

And now she was gone.

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