Page 67 of Ruined

Just fucking breathe.

“Pet.”Ryker.

I rock myself back and forth, palms pressed against my ears. I try to hold a sob back. I can’t let Ryker see me like this. He’ll hold it against me. Ryker is cruel, and he’ll punish me for crying.

“What happened?” Ryker growls.

I shake my head. Why can’t he just go away? I don’t want him here.

The blood pumping in my head makes it hurt worse.Why didn’t Henry just kill me?I should have died.

“Pet, look at me,” Ryker’s voice holds no argument. The water stops hitting my back as I feel his legs move around me. I blink my eyes open, glancing to the side. Ryker’s legs rest on either side of my body.

With blurry eyes, I peer back at Ryker. “You’re safe, it’s just us here,” he whispers.

I don’t believe him. My eyes drift closed, and I slowly lower my head back down to my knees. Ryker doesn’t like that; reaching around, he grabs my throat, and my eyes widen.

“I haven’t lied to you since you’ve been here, and I don’t plan to lie to you.”

I blink my eyes closed, tears leaking down my cheeks.

I’m sorry,I sign.

“Not sure what you’re sorry for, but it better not be for this,” he mumbles into my ear.

A shiver runs down my spine. I want to question Ryker. Why is he being nice to me? But I don’t. I kind of like that he’s holding me, it’s odd.

“When I was fifteen my parents died in a fire. My little sister, Laia, was two and because I was too young to be her guardian, they gave us to my grandma. Laia and I had our sibling fights, but I loved her. She was the reason I joined the military. I wanted to protect her. I wanted to do my twenty years and when I retired, I would be able to take care of her. I had a college fund going, I had bought a house that I was fixing up so she would have a place to live.” Rykerstops talking, his chin resting on the top of my head. Turning my head, I rest my ear against his chest, my eyes drifting closed.

“I was home on leave for her tenth birthday. I bought her this set of play makeup. Grams told me she was obsessed with wearing her makeup and that she needed some of her own. I wanted to give Laia everything she wanted in life.”

I listen to Ryker’s heartbeat as he talks about his sister, but nothing prepares me for what he says next.

“I knew something was wrong when I couldn’t get in touch with Grams. I rushed to our house. It was raining so bad, I almost crashed multiple times, but I needed to get home. I knew something was wrong, being in the military…being overseas, it did something to me. But I never expected for someone in our unit to turn.”

I pull away from Ryker, turning around and I sit between his legs. He sits in the shower fully clothed, mask soaking wet and sad eyes.

Take your mask off,I sign.

Ryker tilts his head to the side, eyes dropping before he shakes his head.

“I’m not the same, pet. I’ve been hurt before. Shot and stabbed, but this was different. I couldn’t save them, I was tied down, listening to their screams. He walked and laughed. He was the last face I saw before I passed out.”

Please, take it off,I beg. I need to see his face.

“Jace saved me, did he tell you that? I didn’t even know he was on leave as well. He was going to surprise Laia. They were like siblings. He even flirted with Grams, mostly just to piss me off. But he was—is family. I wouldn’t be here without him. He got me to the hospital before…” He trails off, glancing away.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I go against the nagging gut feeling to not push him. Reaching up, I touch the bottom of his mask. Ryker blinks back at me, but he doesn’t stop me. Biting my bottom lip, I slowly start to pull his mask off. My hands shake the entire time, but I don’t stop. I keep my eyes on Ryker, not stopping until the mask is off. Dropping it behind him, my eyes widen when I see what he’s talking about.

“I was lucky, my face didn’t get the worst of it. My back and arms, that's a different story.”

My eyes drop down to his gloved hands. Before I can question it, I take the mile, even if he’s only giving me an inch. I grab one of his hands, peeling the glove off, and then the next. Burn scars liter both his hands, three fingers no longer have nails on them.

“I know… I used to be cute.” Ryker chuckles. My eyes snap to his, shaking my head.

You’re beautiful,I sign, reaching forward, my thumb brushing across the burn scar trailing down his cheek into his beard.

“You’re kind,” Ryker whispers.

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