Page 68 of Ruined

My hands trail over his face, brushing over his scars, Ryker flinches but tries to mask it. I wonder if I’m the only one besides maybe Jace that’s seen him. The real him. Am I the only one whose touched him?

“Our past doesn’t define us. I’ll always miss them. I lost a part of myself, but Blake…” Ryker grabs the back of my head, pulling me until we’re nearly an inch apart. “Don’t mistake me, I might treat you like a whore, but you’re mine. Mine and Jace’s. If anyone tries to take you from me, they won’t see daylight again. No one will touch you again,” he declares. I nod my head just as Ryker slams his lips against mine.

25

Blake kisses me back as if she’s been waiting from the moment she saw me. Not that I could blame her. I wanted to kiss her the moment she stepped out of the car. Though I wanted to taint her as well. Make her bleed while my tongue was down her throat. But I didn’t think we would get to that point. I never thought anyone besides Jace would see me.

I moan into her mouth, her tongue dancing around with mine. I can’t get enough of her.

Opening up to her was never part of the plan. I didn’t even want to protect her, but four days in, and she wiggled her way inside my chest. The heart that stopped beating so long ago now beats for her. I was obsessed with the idea of hurting her before, but now I want to hurt her and then care for her. I no longer want to pass her off to Jace.

Blake tries to pull back, but the urge to touch her overpowers everything inside me. One of my hands grabs the back of her head, holding her against me. My other shifts to her back. Many of her scars are raised against my palm. My fingers dig into her skin. Blake runs her hands through my hair, climbing on top of me instead of just sitting between my legs. I’m not sure if she’s aware of whatshe’s doing, but Blake rocks her hips against mine. I would give anything to feel her cunt against my hardening cock. I hiss into her mouth, biting down on her bottom lip. Breaking through her skin, her blood drips into my mouth.

“Fuck,” I groan, pulling back.

Blake slowly blinks her eyes open, arousal written all over her face.

“I would give anything to fuck you right now, pet, but you just had a panic attack.” I can’t believe my ears, or hell, even my mouth for that matter. I’m not sure when things shifted inside; I would like to think yesterday I would have fucked her even if she was panicking. But I can’t say I would now.

Blake glances down, clearly seeing my cock pressed against my pants.

I’m s—

I grab her hands, stopping her from talking.

“I want you, fuck, do I want you, but I’m trying to be a better man,” I whisper. Blake nods her head, but I can see she’s clearly upset.

“Come on, let’s go watch a movie.” Grabbing the back of her thighs, I get to my feet. Blake links her legs behind my back and arms around my neck. Reaching over, I turn the shower off and step out of the tub. Dripping water all over the floor, I carry her through Jace’s room and into the living room.

“Oh, shit,” Jace curses. He sets his cup down on the counter, stepping towards us. “What happened?” His eyes bounce back and forth between us, clearly surprised to see that I no longer have my mask on.

“She was having a panic attack,” I tell him. Blake shifts her head against my shoulder, looking over at him.

“Sunshine,” he whispers, not stopping until he’s right behind us. “Are you okay?”

Blake nods her head.

“What can I do?”

Glancing around the living room, I tilt my head towards the TV. “Let’s watch a movie. Maybe some cinnamon rolls?”

Blake’s head pops up, snapping her eyes at me, the brightest fucking smile I’ve ever seen plastered across her face.

“Let’s get you dressed while Jace puts the cinnamon rolls in the oven.”

Jace nods, bending over and kissing the top of her head. Blake smiles, turning her head and pushing her lips out. Jace’s eyes flicker to mine before doing as she wishes. I thought we had established neither of us cared about sharing her but looks like we were going to have to have a conversation.

Jace backs away, sending Blake one last look before heading back into the kitchen. Carrying her into my room, I set her down on my bed. Turning around quickly, I get to my dresser and pull out an old t-shirt. Taking a deep breath, I’m not usually the one to panic, but something about Blake is triggering.

Except I know it isn’t Blake who is bringing all the memories back. It’s me. I talked about them, I let Blake take off my mask. I’ve done everything to make it so no one sees my face, not even me. But the moment I heard a banging sound when I was listening through the door, I knew what was happening. I’ve seen it before and had my fair share of panic attacks. I knew she was going to have one before I was even done fucking her.

Blake finally let go of herself, and the moment she realized this, she freaked out.

Shaking my head, I turn towards Blake, my eyes sweeping over her body. Different types of scars cover her from head to toe. Bite marks on her neck. Whip and cut marks along her chest, arms, stomach, and legs. Not a clear patch of pale freckled skin shines through.

“Here, put this on.” Handing her the shirt, I head for the door, leaving her behind. I don’t stop until I’m in front of Jace.

Burning flesh fills my nostrils. I can hear their screams but they’re too far away. The handcuffs bite into my skin every time I yank my hand back.

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