Page 128 of Always Been Yours

“If she’s going to be a part ofourdaughters’ lives, then I have a right to know somethings about her.”

“Youtrusted me to take care of them, so you need to trust me to bring good people into their lives,” I counter.

“I do, Grady,” she says with so much sincerity. “But they’re stillmine.“ Arielle isn’t an emotional woman but the tremble of her lip clues me into how hard this is for her. Being away from the girls, feeling like she lost something—a family.

I sigh, knowing she’s right. If the girls were with her and she was seeing a new man, I’d want to know who was going to be in their lives. “Okay, what do you want to know?”

“She’s the girl from the photo albums, isn’t she? I remember the red hair.”

Nodding, I don’t break eye contact as I explain to Arielle my complex history with Vivi. “Yes, she was my childhood best friend. Her brothers, Asher and Hudson, were, too. And Bonnie is my parents’ best friend. I was close with her entire family—“

“Even the sister?” she questions with a raised brow.

Chuckling, I nod. “Yes, even Calypso. She’s like an older sister to me. When I was in high school, Vivi and I had a falling out. She never forgave me for it.” I don’t go into detail about it. She doesn’t need them. “We talked a few times after, but it was few and far between. By the time I met you, I hadn’t spoken to her or any of her siblings in almost three years. I don’t want you to think I was holding onto something while we were together. That wasn’t the case… I wanted things to work out with us, Arielle. I did.”

“For the girls?”

“Mostly, yes. But because I loved you. Iloveyou. I always will. But I’m notin lovewith you.“ We’re both quiet but I can tell she’s working through what I’m saying. With a gentler tone I add, “And you aren’t in love with me.”

“Were we ever in love?” she whispers, looking away.

“I don’t know, Arielle. I really don’t.” I feel like a cretinsaying that to her, but I never felt half of what I do for Vivi when I was with Arielle. And Iknowit wasn’t one-sided… So badly, I want Arielle to find the same for herself.

“You’re in love with her? Vivi?” The ice in her tone has thawed when she says her name this time.

“Yes, I am. And I haven’t been very fair to either of you about it.” Her face crinkles in confusion. “I should’ve told you that I was planning on bringing someone new into the girls’ lives. You deserved a warning so maybe you and her could have met… differently.”

She sucks her lips into her mouth, thinking it over. Finally, she says, “And Vivi deserves better than being a secret from your ex-wife.” I look down again, nodding and ashamed. “The girls haven’t been able to stop talking about her,” she laughs ruefully.

“They like her a lot. She’s good to them.” I pause thinking my next words carefully. “She’s patient. Daisy was an easy egg to crack.” That makes her actually laugh, the smile reaching her eyes. “But Stella… it was harder for her. They both miss you, and Stella felt guilty about liking Vivi. She didn’t want to upset you.”

One single tear slips down her cheek. It’s in my nature to comfort, but I hold myself back, not wanting to cause any more confusion. “I don’t want them to be scared of loving someone new because ofme.”

“I know, Arielle. But you’re their mom. They’ll never want to do anything that might hurt you, even accidentally.” She nods but stays quiet for a long time. I take in her fair skin and dark brown hair that’s the same shade as her eyes… and I feel nothing. I just miss Genevieve.

“I should apologize to her,” she says quietly, more to herself than anything. I shake my head, but she cuts me off before I can speak. “No, Grady. I should. I just felt… scared to seemy people with someone new. Butyouaren’tmineanymore.”

“No, I’m not. But Stella and Daisy willalwaysbe yours. Vivi doesn’t change that. And she doesn’t want to.”

Another tear slips down but she bats it away quickly. She takes a deep breath and sits up straighter. “You need to fix things with this woman, if only so I can say sorry… and hopefully prove I’m not a total twat.”

Laughing, I finally lean over and grab Arielle’s hand. She slips hers into mine, but we don’t interlace fingers like we used. We just give each other a small squeeze and stare at each other.

“I don’t know how to move on, Grady… I don’t just mean from you because you’re right—we weren’t happy. I’m just so scared to be alone. And I hate being away from the girls I don’t want them to grow up thinking I don’t love them. I just…”

I cover her hand with my other one, pulling gently until she looks at me. “Yes, you do. You’re so strong, Arielle. You were right to ask for the divorce.” She doesn’t try to wipe the tears running down her cheeks. “We couldn’t live like that forever. We didn’tdeserveto.“ So unhappy, half-loved and alone in a relationship. “You deserve to be happy and to accomplish your dreams. You deserve to be a little selfish for the first time in your adult life.” She starts crying hard, covering her face with her free hand. “And you and I—together—will make sure the girls know you love them so much. You’re setting an example for them. One I am so proud of.”

“Do you mean that?” She looks up at me. Her nose is red, and her cheeks have tear streaks running down them. I’ve never seen her look so young and vulnerable.

“Yes, Arielle. I do. I’m so thankful you’re their mom.”

She nods and tries to catch her breath. “I feel the same way about you. Even though we weren’t meant to be together, you were so good to me for years. And I’ll never forgetthat.”

“Me neither,” I say softly with a shake of my head. “But… the girls and I are staying here. We can’t uproot their lives again. Stella’s doing phenomenal in school, and Daisy has her first friend.”

She nods again. “And this isyourhome.”

“It is. But any place that Stella and Daisy are, is your home too. You’re welcome to come visit anytime you want—with some warning,” I offer her a small smile and she huffs out a laugh. “And the girls will take trips to see you in New York or wherever you’re touring. I want them to see that part of your life because you’re incredible on a stage.” It’s true. I saw a few plays she was in at ASU. She’s talented and captivating. It’s partly why I knew this was the right choice for us.

---