Page 6 of Always Been Yours

“I got one for me.” Translation: pepperoni with half pineapple and half banana peppers. “One pepperoni, and pepperoni and mushroom.”

“Are we getting dessert?” Daisy asks.

“Your aunt is bringing stuff for sundaes, at Millie’s request.” She smiles up at me as we step up to the take-out counter.

“Grady Miller,” a deep voice booms from the open kitchen. “I was hoping you would stop in soon.” Carlo, the owner of Tossin’ Tomatoes, walks over to me. I stick my hand out for a shake, but he pulls me into a hug. “Come here, son. Your parents let me know you were moving back but I wasn’t sure when I would be seeing you.” He releases me with a pat on the shoulder.

Carlo has owned the small restaurant long before my family and I moved out here. He has become good friends with my parents and Bonnie, Vivi’s mom, over the years. That’s kind of how our small community at Amada Beach is, you are, at the very least, friendly with everyone.

“How long has it been now? Are these your girls?” He smiles down at Stella and Daisy.

He looks the same with his full belly and goatee, but his chestnut hair has quite a bit more silver than the last time I saw him.

And if I’m being truthful, that was way too long ago. Something like five years. I was visiting alone, which I did a lot during my marriage. Arielle, my ex-wife, said she didn’t feel like she fit in here. I neverreallytried to correct her because it was the truth. It was similar to the way I didn’t fit into her family’s Upper Eastside lifestyle in Manhattan. It didn’t matter how much we liked and enjoyed each other’s families either. That was never the problem. It was something between her and I that fit together enough but never felt exactly right. Like when you’re down to your last pair ofthick, wool socks and all day your shoes feel slightly tighter than usual.

“Too long, Carlo, but we are here to stay now.” I place a hand on each of my daughters’ heads. “These are my girls. Stella and Daisy.”

They both mumble a quiethi, much more subdued than when I found them with Vivi.

He smiles at the three of us with something like pride in his eyes. “I’m excited for the next generation of Miller birthdays celebrated here. Now, if only any of those Davies kids would have their own babies, it’d really feel like old times.”

“Well, you know the four of them always have their own plans for things.” The fact that none of them are married—sans Calypso’s divorce—and are all childless, doesn’t surprise me in the slightest, especially not after watching them grow up with a single mother.

“Hmm.” He gives me an assessing look. “What about your plans?”

I shrug. “I’m working at the charter school and starting up the baseball team soon.”

“Yes, son, I know all that. Your parents told me.” I shake my head, not understanding what he wants to know. He glances down at my daughters then back up to me. “Do your plans involve… reconnecting with anyone in particular?”

“My mom might as well start a gossip blog at this point.” I roll my eyes, shoving my hands in my pockets.

“Take that up with her,” he shrugs back at me. “All I’m saying is you should think about it. Anyway, your pizzas are on the house.” He winks at Stella and Daisy, “And I threw in an order of brownies.”

Both girls instantly perk up. “We can use them in the sundaes!” Daisy exclaims.

We say our goodbyes, ending with me promising to be aroundmuch more. And I mean it. Not only is my family here but knowing how Amada Beach has welcomed new families cemented my decision to move back to my hometown. I want my daughters to grow up with a community supporting them, not just their dad hundreds of miles away from any family.

“Stell, you’re not in trouble,” I start carefully. I look at my older daughter in the rearview mirror and can’t help my heart from breaking a little when I see our emotional similarities as clearly as I can see our matching eyes. The divorce has been harder on Stella even though she tries to hide it for Daisy’s sake. She has been happier since we moved here. Brighter, livelier. But I know that the last two and a half years have also aged her in a way that’s not fair to a kid. “I just want to know what you heard the other night when Auntie Blake was over.”

She looks out the window for a few moments before quietly explaining, “I just was scared in the new house… I didn’t mean to spy on you guys, but I didn’t want to interrupt either. I was sitting at the top of the stairs waiting for you to come up.” She finally meets my eyes in the mirror. “You were fighting about if Viv—Miss Davies—hated you or not, but the fight didn’t really make sense because you both said she did but weren’t agreeing on anything either.” Giving me her best attempt at looking innocent, she adds, “You know, Daddy, Auntie Blake said a lot of bad words while you were talking… now that you know I heard everything, can you tell her that she owes the swear jarat leasttwenty dollars?“ She blinks at me through her lashes and sticks out her bottom lip. It’s thesame pouty face I make but the difference is, hers is intentional.

I chuckle and consider letting Stella demand twenty dollars from my sister. And what can I do other than insist she complies; those are the rules.

About six months ago, the girls caught me sayingshitfor the first time in their lives. Stella, always the ringleader, decided that was enough reason to implement a swear jar. At the end of every year, she and Daisy get to take the money to the toy store and split however much theyearn, as Stella described it. I know they were hoping to make out like bandits by January but if the rules applied to only me, they would be lucky to split five dollars.

Blakewasannoying that night so screw it. “Sure, Stell, I’ll let her know.”

She smiles triumphantly before turning to look back out the window.

Stella is right, Blake and I were agreeing on the fact that Vivi hates me. She made it perfectly clear the last time I saw her at my parents’ vow renewal. She used those exact words, actually.

‘I hate you.‘

It definitely wasn’t the smartest idea to try to talk to her when she, Lexi and her three siblings were all plastered before the sun fully set, but I hadn’t expected that either.

Blake was still in high school when that happened, and not very close with Vivi anymore.

Blake thinks I’m ‘the world’s biggest asswipe‘,her exact quote, for taking the job at the charter school knowing that I would be working alongside Genevieve. I insisted I could avoid her for the entirety of the year and my loving sister insisted that I’m ‘even more hopeless and clueless and balls-less than even she predicted‘,again her exact quote. When I refused to tell her, for the millionth time, what happened between Vivi and I, she told me that it was ‘fucking bullshit‘.I then proceeded to ask her what happened between the two of them and she called me ‘a fucking busybody who is just as bad as our mother‘.

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