Page 10 of Sugared

“That’s not true,” Ean said before he could stop himself. “I used to think about you all the time. I thought you were wonderful. I had such a crush on you when you came to hang out at our house. I…I even thought of you after I was kicked out, when I needed to remind myself that there are good people in the world.”

Leland looked so sad for a moment before reaching for Ean’s free hand and squeezing it.

A moment later, he let go and said, “I hope this doesn’t change things. I don’t want you to see me as threatening or like I’m after something with you. I’ve always liked you, too, and right now, I just want to help you, no strings attached.”

“No, no this is good,” Ean said. He had to take another gulp of tea to swallow the lump in his throat, but then he put his mug aside and twisted to face Leland more fully. “You understand, you know? I mean, I’m not the same as you. I’m pretty pitiful, actually. I can’t really take care of myself, I’m kind of an idiot, and I can’t read when I get stressed out.”

“Shush,” Leland stopped him, raising a hand. “I don’t want to hear that. You’ve always been one of the kindest, sweetest people I know. Dyslexia is just a circumstance. It doesn’t make you stupid. And it’s not a bad thing to be the sort of person who does better in partnership with others instead of on your own.”

Ean could hardly believe his ears. No one had ever said anything half so nice to him before. “I don’t want to be a burden,” he said quietly, lowering his eyes.

Leland surprised him by cupping the side of his face and tilting it up to look at him.

“You’re not a burden,” he said. “I don’t see helping you as you burdening me at all. I like helping people.”

“Oh,” Ean said, lowering his eyes, even though he couldn’t tilt his face down.

“Hey. What’s that about?” Leland asked with a slight frown.

Ean wished he hadn’t made a sound. He wished he could lie and pretend it was nothing, but he was just so tired and weak that he didn’t have the energy to make up lies.

“You like helping people,” he said. “That’s great. I bet you’d help anyone who couldn’t manage to keep themselves off the streets.”

Leland hummed like he understood. “But I don’t help everyone,” he said, a small sparkle in his eyes, his cheeks flushing. “I helped you. I want to continue helping you. Because you’re Ean Jones, the sweetest young man I know. So sweet you’re like sugar.”

Ean couldn’t help but smile as he felt his face flood with heat.

“I had a crush on you back in the day, too, you know,” Leland said.

Ean jerked his head up and gaped at him. “No! You couldn’t have. I was such a miserable, scrawny kid. I’m still absolute rubbish.”

“You’re definitely not,” Leland said firmly. “You’re beautiful. And you’re trying so hard.” He paused, grinned, and said, “But yes, you were too young for me back then.”

“But now?”

Ean wanted to kick himself for letting those two words out.

“Now,” Leland said, putting his mug down and moving in to clasp both sides of Ean’s face.

He leaned in until their faces were only inches apart. Ean breathed in, loving the scent of the kitchen that seemed to envelop Leland. He loved the dark depths of his eyes and the flush of his cheeks. His eyes dropped to stare at Leland’s lips. They were so soft and inviting. All he could think about was that Leland Page was going to kiss him.

Except he didn’t.

“Now,” Leland repeated, his voice rougher, sitting straight again, “I don’t want to take advantage of someone in a difficult spot who really needs my help.”

“You can take advantage of me, I don’t mind,” Ean said in a rush.

Leland laughed and leaned back, taking one of Ean’s hands. “I’ll think about it. But right now, I think it’s more important that we talk about how to get you back on your feet instead of how I can get in your pants.”

A fresh wave of heat and embarrassment swept through Ean. “Anytime you want me, I’m yours,” he said solemnly. He wanted to make sure Leland knew he wasn’t joking or being flippant.

“I know,” Leland answered, just as seriously. That had Ean’s heart racing all over again. “And the same goes for me. Anytime you want me, I will absolutely give you what you need.”

Ean smiled. He debated telling Leland that he wanted him right now in all the sexual ways.

Leland nipped that in the bud by saying, “I think it’s more important to sort out your safety and security than it is for us to follow our libidos right now.”

“Aw, shucks,” Ean said with what he was certain was a cheesy grin. It was the first time he’d tried to make a joke in months.

---