Page 15 of Sugared

Ean dreaded it when they finished tidying up the kitchen and Leland extended a hand to take his. “Come on,” he said, his expression all concern. “Let’s go upstairs and talk about things.”

“Okay,” Ean croaked.

He cleared his throat and took Leland’s hand, letting himself be led like a lost lamb. The truth was that he felt incredibly lost. He’d been lost and Leland had found him. Now he was afraid that if Leland let go, he’d be lost forever, even if Mr. Patrick Tate had offered him a job.

It almost made things worse that Leland’s flat felt like home once they got upstairs. Leland directed him to sit on the couch, then made tea for them. By the time he brought it to the couch and sat with him, Ean was shaking.

“You think I should take the job at The Chameleon Club, don’t you,” he blurted without so much as sipping his tea. “You don’t want me here anymore. You want to go back to your life.”

“What? No!” Leland blinked.

He took the mug of tea out of Ean’s hand as fast as he’d given it to him and put both their mugs on the coffee table. That felt like a metaphor for everything in Ean’s life.

“I’m in the way,” Ean blurted, flailing a little. How could he not flail when everything he’d ever wanted and finally got was being taken away from him? “You don’t want me here. I’m just some random guy who showed up in your life a few days ago, and now you want me gone.”

“No,” Leland said, catching his hands and holding them tightly between the two of them. “Sugar, that’s not it at all.”

Tears stung at Ean’s eyes over the sweet name Leland had started calling him.

“I know that it might seem like I only brought you here because I felt sorry for you,” Leland went on. “And I definitely do feel responsible for you. But it’s so much more than that. I’ve always liked you, Ean. I’ve always wanted you. These last few days have been absolutely wonderful. I’ve enjoyed having you around so much.”

“But now you want me to go,” Ean said, fighting not to cry. Leland couldn’t possibly want someone as emotionally fragile as him. He never used to cry like this, but life had become much too much for him.

“Hey, listen,” Leland said, stopping his spiraling emotions by cradling the side of his face. “Just listen to me without jumping to conclusions, okay?”

Ean swallowed and nodded tightly. He could do this. He could sit there and listen to Leland burst the happy bubble he’d been living in for five beautiful days.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Leland said. He stopped there, pressed his lips together, and seemed to think about things before he went on. “Okay, I’m going to be really blunt, because I feel like you’re expecting me to say one thing, and if I don’t spell things out really clearly, you might misunderstand me.”

Ean wasn’t sure what that meant, but he nodded.

Leland took a deep breath, then said, “I really like you, Ean. I liked you years ago, but in these last few days, I’ve seen a whole other side of you. You’re still the same Ean I was friends with back then, but you’re so much stronger now, and you’ve been through so much.”

“I’m not strong,” Ean blurted, even though he was pretty sure he wasn’t supposed to talk. “I can’t take care of myself. I just want someone to take care of me. I want you to take care of me. Like, a lot. I’m not sure it’s right. You probably think I’m pointless and stupid.”

“Ssh.” Leland touched a finger to Ean’s lips, sending a shiver of longing through him. “I don’t think you’re stupid or weak,” he said. “If I’m totally honest, I like how you need to lean on me for support. I keep thinking that maybe it’s a bit wrong for me to like it so much, but if what I’m hearing is right, you want what I want.”

“I want to stay here, with you,” Ean whispered, afraid that everything would evaporate as soon as the words were out.

But Leland smiled and continued to caress Ean’s face. “I want you here with me, too,” he said. “I can’t tell you how jealous I felt when Tate offered you a job. If I didn’t know it before, I knew it then. I don’t want you to leave. I want you to stay with me as mine, my friend, my boyfriend, maybe other things, I don’t know.”

Ean blinked, hardly believing what he was hearing. “You…want me?”

“So much, sugar,” Leland said.

He clasped Ean’s face with both hands and leaned in to kiss his lips.

It was everything Ean had ever dreamed of in a kiss and more. Leland was powerful and demanding. He turned Ean’s bones to jelly with the strength of his want. And he was a damn good kisser, too. He knew how to use his lips and tongue and everything. Ean had so little experience with really good kisses that he could only hover there, eyes closed, letting Leland have everything.

“I want you, too,” Ean managed to push out when they broke for air. “I want everything. I want to stay with you, and I want to go to bed with you.”

He gasped when he realized what had just come out of his mouth.

But instead of looking at him in disgust or jumping him and taking what he wanted right there on the couch, Leland smiled. He smiled with a light in his eyes that seemed to come straight from his heart.

“Honestly, I want that, too,” he said. “I’ve wanted you under me since that first night.”

“You can have me,” Ean said, scooting closer to him. “I’m a bottom. I like sucking cock. I think I’d really like it if you fucked me.”