Page 3 of Sugared

He took another look at the lottery ticket that he still clutched as if it were more than a useless shred of paper. It wasn’t just a symbol of the end of his hopes, it was a sign of just how low he’d fallen now. He’d accepted what he’d been promised was a winning lottery ticket to let his friend Jimmy’s uncle fuck him.

Of course, neither he nor Jimmy had known that’s what would happen. Jimmy had been trying to help him, but his mum said Ean couldn’t stay on her couch anymore. That was when the uncle had casually mentioned he had a spare bedroom at his place, if Ean was interested. Ean had jumped at the chance to have a real bed to sleep in. He should have known it would come with strings attached.

It had been a nightmare, but at least it was over. At least that part of it was over. He’d done what he’d thought he had to do willingly, taken the lottery ticket as payment, packed his bag and left. He’d sworn to himself that as bad as things got, he would never trade sex for money again.

But he hadn’t had anywhere to go. Jimmy hadn’t been home when he’d dropped by, his mum had chased him away and called him names, and the nearest shelter was not only full, it was scary as hell. Ean had spent the last two weeks sleeping rough, no money for food, too afraid to beg, and resorting to earning barely enough to keep himself from passing out from hunger with his mouth.

He'd finally broken down and taken the lottery ticket to the off-license to cash in when hunger overcame his fear of people asking him how he’d ended up with something so magical. He’d been afraid someone would steal the ticket, afraid they’d say he had no right to win the lottery because of how he’d ended up with the magic numbers. Honestly, he was afraid of exactly what had just happened, too, that the ticket was a fake.

“Ean? You alright?”

Ean snapped out of the paralysis he’d been stuck in and looked up at Leland. His face was itchy with drying tears and dirt, and his stomach chose just that moment to growl.

Leland took a deep, angry breath and puffed it out through his nose. “Throw in a couple sandwiches and a bottle of water, too,” he told the man behind the counter, then stepped to the case where lunch things were on display. “Which is your favorite?”

It took Ean a second to figure out that Leland was talking to him. “Me?” he asked, his voice small and shaky.

“Yes,” Leland said. “Something tells me you need a sandwich. You probably need a lot more than that.”

Ean started trembling. It was a stupid reaction, one that would make him look weak and vulnerable.

Sudden memories of his dad yelling at him, calling him weak and prissy and a lot of other bad names rang in his head. All because he’d been caught looking at porn online. What twenty year old didn’t look on porn online? Only with him, it had been gay porn, and that had been the last straw where his dad, his entire family, was concerned.

“Ean?”

Ean blinked. “Sorry. Um, anything is fine, I’m not picky.”

Leland studied him for a few seconds with a frown, then grabbed two sandwiches and took them to the counter, where the cashier guy was bagging his things. He handed one of the sandwiches directly to Ean.

Ean burst into tears again as he stared at the boxed sandwich. It was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. All food was beautiful to him now. Just the other day, he’d stood in front of the window at Kokoro Sushi looking at everything inside like he was at a museum.

“I can’t pay you back,” he sniffled through his tears.

“That’s okay,” Leland said with a smile. “We’ll think of something.”

Ean swallowed hard and glanced up at Leland again. He knew what that meant. He’d heard it a few too many times in the last six months of couch surfing and sleeping out.

Then again, how many times had he fantasized about Leland Page finally taking notice of him as someone other than the kid who hung around him and Davie? How many times had he wanked in the shower while trying to picture what Leland looked like naked? Leland was still so handsome and built. He radiated kindness. Ean was sure he was gross and dirty. He was so far beneath Leland’s notice, but not only had Leland bought him a sandwich, once he’d paid for everything, he handed Ean one of the shopping bags and told him to follow him out to the car.

“Where are you staying?” Leland asked once they were driving down the main road.

Ean swallowed hard and fought not to cry again. “Nowhere,” he forced himself to croak out.

“Nowhere?” Leland glanced at him in concern.

Ean shook his head and stared down at the sandwich that he still hadn’t opened and the bottle of water in his lap.

“As in homeless?” Leland asked carefully.

Ean squeezed his eyes shut and nodded.

“How is that possible?” Leland growled. “What about your parents? What about Davie?”

Drawing in a breath, Ean forced himself to raise his head and look at Leland. “Dad kicked me out when he…when he caught me watching gay porn,” he confessed honestly. “He kicked me out for being gay.” That was the real reason.

“What?” Leland said, nearly shouting. “That’s so wrong. And Davie?”

“Called me…the F-word and slammed the door in my face,” Ean said.

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