Page 95 of The Duke's Ultimatum

Derek turned his body towards her so now they were both facing each other, their hands still connected. “Of course.”

“Do you want me?”

Derek’s hand tightened again before he tried to pull it away. Eleanor clamped down. “Answer me, Derek. Right now, if you could have me, love me, be with me, would you?”

Derek’s eyes darkened with regret. “Eleanor, you know we?—”

“Forget rules. Forget society.” She scooted closer to him and took his other hand. “Right now, here, in this garden, between you and me, would you have me as your wife?”

Derek said nothing for a moment. They both sat, knees touching knees, hands holding hands, eyes searching eyes.

Finally, Derek sighed and pulled his hands from hers. “You don’t understand, Eleanor. This line of thinking is no good for either one of us. We cannot be.”

“That is not what I’m asking; I’m saying, if you had a choice, would I be it?”

“Those questions will only lead to heartache, Eleanor. I’m not the man for you. I never will be.”

“Says who?”

“Me.”

Eleanor shook her head in confusion. “I don’t understand. The other day at breakfast you alluded that you missed your opportunity with me. What if you didn’t?”

Derek raised an eyebrow. “Last I remember, that day you couldn’t wait to get out of that room to go dress shopping when you heard that! It didn’t seem like you were too keen on the idea of us being together.”

“I was scared, confused. I felt on top of the world after our night together, but I thought it was because whatever was between us had run its course. But I was wrong; it only reinforced it. When I saw you the next morning, my illusion shattered, and I realized that I had just given my heart away to a man who is not my intended husband.”

Derek took Eleanor’s head into his hands. “Don’t say that. I don’t deserve your heart.”

Eleanor ignored his words. “When I heard you say that you felt as if you lost the chance to be with me, I thought I was angry at you; now, I see I was just angry at myself for believing such a ridiculous lie. I was stupid for convincing myself that I felt nothing of worth for you and that marrying Simon would go on as planned without any regrets. But, Derek, I must know, or I will have regrets. Tell me. Would. You. Have. Me?”

Derek sat quiet for moment. He dropped his hands from her face to take her hands. With his thumbs, he rubbed slow circles on the top of her hands.

“Did you know I was once engaged to be married?”

Eleanor furrowed her brow. “No, I did not.”

Derek nodded his head. “I was just a bit older than you, I was engaged to bright, young woman, who was raised much like you were. She was schooled in how to be the renowned, dutiful wife.”

Eleanor’s stomach churned at the thought of Derek being married to someone else. She inwardly cringed at the thought of this unknown woman getting his kisses, his touches. She wanted to pull away, but something told her to sit and listen to his story.

“You’re not married. What happened?”

“Success happened. Or, at least, the promise of success.” Derek looked into Eleanor’s eyes.

“My father introduced me to a man, James Morrison. He offered me a chance to work in one of his factories. I jumped at the opportunity, much to the dismay of my parents. I broke off the engagement to Elizabeth, my parents disowned me, and I made my fortune. And the thing is, Eleanor, and you must understand this next part, I don’t regret it.”

Eleanor cocked her head, not understanding. “Why would it matter to me if you regret it or not? It obviously was the right move for you.”

Derek shook his head. “You don’t understand, Eleanor. I’m not husband material. Up until coming here, I had no intention of settling down, I wanted more out of life than a wife and children.”

Eleanor squeezed his hands. “You said yourself you were young. Perhaps she wasn’t the girl for you, or it wasn’t the right time for you to marry.”

Derek winced. “Eleanor, you were born for this life, I was not. Girls like you and Elizabeth need a husband who will be there for you through all the ups and downs. Someone who’ll be at the society balls or operas. I’m always looking for the newest deal I can make. I need more than society life can give me.” He gestured to the house. “Do you remember what I told you when I first got here? I wanted to marry you all off, so I could get back to my business deals. Having a wife interferes with that.”

Eleanor’s heart broke with each word. She willed the tears that were pooling behind her eyes not to fall.

Derek abruptly stood. “I’m sorry, Eleanor. I cannot be your husband. You deserve more than what I can give you. I’m sure you will be very happy with the Viscount. I wish you well.”

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