Page 132 of Midnight Coven

“How do you even know about that, Malek?” Nick asked, frustrated.

“I’m a seer,” Mal said simply. “I was worried about you. Ms. James said she couldn’t feel you, so I tried to find you through your friend. James Morley.”

Nick glanced at the seat across from him.

Morley saw his look and quirked an eyebrow, but Nick didn’t try to answer his silent question.

“I couldn’t feel you,” Malek clarified. “But I could see you. Through James. You looked upset. And confused. I know your facial expressions pretty well by now.”

Nick felt weirdly touched.

He also kind of wanted to shake the seer.

“How is that going to help me, Malek? Knowing that?”

Malek blinked in the virtual monitor. He looked surprised.

“Well, I just thought you should be careful,” he said, still sounding puzzled. “If you get confused… it might be harder to fight back. He could get into your mind, maybe. Convince you that he’s really you. I would think that would be confusing… that it might make it really hard for you to fight back.”

Nick nodded, thinking about that.

“Okay,” he said. “I get that.”

Malek went on in the same peaceful voice.

“He hates his own life, I think,” he said, matter of fact. “I think it really shocked him, seeing how you live. He saw your life and your friends and the way you move through the world, and for the first time thought maybe his life didn’t have to be what it is. I think he told himself all vampires live like he does, that all of them kill and live alone like he does.”

In the darkness behind Nick’s eyes, Malek shrugged.

“He didn’t understand, I think. He couldn’t understand why his life is so bad, why yours went a different way. He felt you thinking about how you were in the wrong place, and he started thinking, well, maybe that’s it. MaybeI’min the wrong place… do you see? He thinks if he gets back there, especially with Ms. James, maybe his life will look like yours. Maybe things will be better for him, and he can have all the things he thought he lost. Family. Friends. Love.”

Nick frowned. “Is he right? Would it be better for him?”

Malek blinked.

After a pause, he shrugged his broad shoulders.

“How would I knowthat,Nick?”

Nick clenched his jaw.

He thought about everything Malek said.

“Is there anything I can do about that?” he asked after another beat, clenching his jaw. “Is there anything I can do to stop it, if I get confused like that again?” He tried to make it a joke. “I’m not going to turn into a rampaging murderer, am I, Malek?”

Malek paused. Then he shrugged again.

“I don’t know. I mean… it’s possible, I guess. In theory, everything in him is already in you.” Malek paused, still thinking. “I don’t think so, though. You made such different choices, Nick. At the end of the day, I still believe that’s what makes us unique. Choices. Free will. You know… the stuff we do with the stuff we get.”

Nick nodded. Remembering what Jem had done for him, how he practically forced Nick to be a better person, a better vampire, a better man, Nick exhaled.

“I had a lot of help,” he admitted.

“Because a lot of people loved you,” Malek returned easily. “Everyone makes choices, Nick. You let that love into your life, even before. So more people wanted to help you. That’s not something you should feel bad about. You should feel good about that. People who let others love them, who let themselves love fully back… those are the good people, Nick.”

Nick felt a tightening in his chest.

“I don’t want to lose any of you,” he told the seer. “I don’t want any of you to get hurt, Mal. I will be really, really upset if any of you get hurt… or lost.”

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