She cupped Shy Shy’s cheek lovingly. “I’ll see you soon, pretty girl.”
I sighed in relief when she finally walked over to me. I avoided Island’s eyes as I took Shy Shy’s hand once she was close enough. Without another word, I turned and left A Little More Shea like it was the last place I wanted to be on earth, even though the opposite was true. Despite my attraction to Island and admiration of her care for my daughter, I couldn’t shake the feeling that letting myself get closer to her would lead to another emotional disaster.
Island
I stood anxiously in the walkway as my last customer of the day walked out of the shop. My body deflated as the adrenaline of the day started to drain out of me. There was a nonstop flow of shoppers today, and while I was thankful, I was also thankful for it to be over. My feet were aching so bad. My Tiffany Malone slides were not made for standing for long periods of time.
I limped to the front door and locked up for the night. Doubling back, I headed to the front counter to take a seat. I picked up my phone to see I’d missed a call from Shyheim. Seeing his contact’s name sent me into a flurry of emotions. We talked every day since the day we exchanged numbers. I didn’t want to admit it, but I had a soft spot for Shyheim and his daughter.
He had a way of making me feel seen even when all I wanted to do was disappear. His words were always so gentle and kind. I noticed that he loved to go out of his way to make me laugh too. I was doing it so often now it was becoming harder to put my guard up around him. He made me want to melt the ice around my heart. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say he was standing right there with the ice pick ready to chip away every piece until he got to the real me.
I debated on whether or not I was going to call him back and decided against it at the last second. Guilt sunk to the bottom of my stomach, because I knew it would be wrong to encourage him. His attraction was clear, and loving me would be bad for him. To love me was to welcome death. He couldn’t ask the last two men to give me their hearts because that’s exactly what happened to them.
I tried to fight the memories from coming, but it was no use. Tears welled in my eyes as I was sucked into my heartbreaking past.
“You’re the only girl I love, Island,” Blain whispered in my ear.
Even though he’d consumed way too much alcohol tonight, I knew he was telling the truth. Blain’s world revolved around me, and anyone with eyes would be able to see that.
The feeling was mutual, though. I would give anything for that boy... do anything for that boy. My parents hated it but gave up fighting against me long ago. My plans to go to college were on the backburner as I made plans to travel with Blain after he got his commercial driver’s license. We were going to see the states together.
My baby was from the streets, but he was turning his life around… for me. He was willing to go to war with his own set… for me. He was going to step out of his comfort zone and do something he never thought he could… for me. I wouldn’t trade the love I’d found with him for the world’s greatest treasure.
“Oh shit,” he cursed in my ear seconds before I heard the gun go off.
Pow!
I was pushed to the floor and toppled over without my consent. I don’t know how much time passed of me laying there under his crushing weight as the world around me erupted into chaos.
When it started to calm down, Blain lifted his head to look at me. There was a dazed look in his watery eyes.
“I love you, Island.”
He dropped his lips to mine and kissed me softly. I was about to tell him I loved him too when his body went limp.
All I remember after that was the sound of my hollow screams, flashing lights, and blood… lots and lots of blood. Nothing could erase those last moments from my mind. They were tattooed on my heart for life.
I wiped my eyes, returning to the present. My body felt heavy and weighed down. Little beads of sweat began popping up across my forehead. I wiped them away with the back of my hand as I tried to take deep breaths to calm myself down, but it was no use. Before I could fully recover, I was thrust into another memory that gutted me like a fish.
It was years later, and I’d allowed myself to be stupid enough to love again. This time I thought I was safe because I’d steered clear of the bad boy type. Fate had other plans for me…
“Bae, do you have to go?”
My lips poked out, hoping I would get my way. For some reason, I didn’t want Rydell to leave, but he was adamant that he had a class to get to.
Being in medical school came with its own responsibility, which I respected, but it was going to storm really bad. Why couldn’t he get the day off? I needed his hands on my body as I watched That’s So Raven on Hulu with a bed full of snacks.
His arms snaked around my waist. “I’ll be back before the weather gets bad.”
His lips went to my forehead. My eyes watered, knowing he was leaving.
“You sure my son isn’t in there making you so emotional these days,” he teased, placing a hand on my bloated belly. “Remember, I’m setting us up for the future. I never want you to worry about money or shit like that. I want your life as my wife to be easier than breathing. I’m willing to do whatever it takes to make that happen.”
I nodded despite the sadness grasping at my heartstrings. He gave me a kiss then walked out the door. Something sent me standing on the porch to watch him go. His motorcycle roared to life as I glanced up at the dark clouds swirling in the sky. He’d better make it back before the sky opened up.
A few hours later, I was lying in bed doing exactly what I wanted to be when I got that call that stopped my heart. His bike had slid off the road and hit a tree. He was gone by the time the paramedics arrived.
I was sure my cries could be heard around the world. I didn’t think I’d ever have to feel this pain again. Yet, there I was standing over his grave unable to move or look away. I was never going to hear his voice again or feel his hands grazing over my skin ever so softly… I held the engagement ring they’d found on him the night of the accident. It broke my heart even more knowing planning his proposal was the reason he’d left the house that day.