Page 25 of Sparks Will Fly

“So, you want me to walk up to her and ask if she wants to be with me?”

She nodded. “Yes, and tell her how you feel. I mean, the Aisley situation was bad, but I don’t think it’s enough to keep you two apart forever. Y’all are both just scared right now and don’t know what to expect. She needs to know you’ll be willing to fight for her when things are uncertain. Women need reassurance as badly as we need air to breathe.”

She stooped down in front of me, placing her hands on my knees.

“Just go to her. If it turns out she really doesn’t want to be with you, then fuck that ho. She ain’t all that anyway.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that. I could tell by her smirk that it was her intention to lighten my mood. I’d been in a funk since the day my mother wouldn’t stop calling my phone. I knew without a doubt she was calling to ask for something. No matter how many times she made her sister hit me up, I wouldn’t budge. It got to the point that I even started sending Mama Toy to voicemail. If she couldn’t be on my side and respect what I wanted, then I was going to have to ice her out too.

“I don’t…” I couldn’t formulate the right words.

While a part of me wanted nothing more than to go after Lovie, I had to admit there was another side that felt like this was for the best. I couldn’t be the man she needed when I had was covered in battle wounds that made me question everything.

“Why couldn’t she just trust me when I said there was nothing going on with Aisley? We wouldn’t even be having this conversation right now.”

“It’s just too soon. She has to know she can trust you with her heart first. Waiting a fucking week to go after her probably has her thinking you don’t give two fucks when you do. Stop playing games, and go get your woman.”

Leaning backward,I laid down on the cool aluminum of the bleachers, getting comfortable in one of the baseball fields at the community center. I’d just wrapped up another Sophisticated Saturday and couldn’t bring myself to even smile. There was so much on my mind… well…someoneI thought about as often as I inhaled.

Romani was hogging up all the space in my brain to the point I was struggling to function. There was so much I wanted to say… so many ways things could’ve played out the last time I saw him. I felt an array of emotions from embarrassment at how I reacted—anger for allowing myself to get my feelings involved and deep sadness from his absence.

I hadn’t expected a week to go by without hearing from him, but it had. No matter how badly I wanted to convince myself it wasn’t anything special or evolved enough to be ruminating over, I couldn’t believe it. My heart wouldn’t let me. She clenched and twisted every time I was brave enough to acknowledge her existence. Romani was one of a kind, and I knew it.

I was so used to being in control in my intimate relationships it felt different to have the ball in another’s court. Now that I had time to reflect, I could admit I lashed out from a place of fear. I’d had countless whirlwind romances that started off beautifully but ultimately ended and left me shattered.

I knew I was falling fast, and Aisley being in his bedroom made me feel like I couldn’t trust him. I’d been cheated on countless times, and I would never be okay with it. I deserved better than that. For the first time, I got the last word, and it wasn’t enough. My curiosity stirred in continuous circles, wondering if he wasn’t reaching out because there really was more with her.

I unscrewed the cap on my flask taking a shot of Sade Platinum to the head. I figured since I was already drunk off yearning some real liquor wouldn’t hurt. If I had my way, it’d help me forget everything that hurt me. The pain I was feeling went deeper than Romani. Wounds that I’d left bleeding for a long time started to ache again. I thought I’d finally found genuine acceptance with Romani, but it was a joke from the universe.

“You’ve been mighty quiet today,” Drey’s voice came from nowhere. I opened my eyes to find her standing right above my head. “And you got the nerve to be drinking without me? I ought to scratch your eyes right now.”

I chuckled softly. “My bad, girl. Just got a lot on my mind.”

She took a seat beside me after I sat up.

“I can see that. You want to talk about it?”

I was about to reply when my phone vibrating in my pocket distracted me. I glanced at the screen seeing Granny’s name scroll across for what felt like the millionth time.

“Hold on. ’Cause my granny keep calling me.”

Drey nodded as I picked up the call.

“Hey, Granny. Are you okay? I’ve been busy with spa day.”

Drey snatched my flask from my hands, making us giggle. I straightened up when Granny finally responded.

“I need you to come over. It’s important.”

“What is it? I don’t want to be in suspense.”

“You’ll see when you get here.” I never got the chance to put up a fuss because she hung up on me.

“Oop!She hung up on me,” I said baffled by her audacity.

Drey burst into a laugh that nearly had her choking on the liquor.

“What was she talking about?”

---