Page 37 of Dreaux: The Corporate Assassin

“I was thinking that maybe you could accompany me to an event next weekend,” I inquired as I sipped the ginger ale she’d placed in front of me. I usually wouldn’t ask this of someone I’d just met, but Denim’s vibe was cool, and after reviewing the file that Mimi sent over, I knew everything I needed to know. She went to answer, but a thought occurred, causing me to cut her off before she could even speak. “Are you still dealing with her father? I don’t mean to be invasive—just curious. I’d hate to knock that nigga outta his shoes because you know the fellas don’t play about their baby mama’s.”

She smirked as she peered at me over her shoulder. I couldn’t help but do the same. If she didn’t fix her face, I was going to give in to my intrusive thoughts and have her head knocking into the dishwasher. Visualizing her body under the robe had me adjusting my homie and telling myself that tonight wasn’t for any of that.

“I thought it was just dick and dinner with us, Dre. But give me the details of where we’re going. I’ll make a special exception to our previous discussion by attending.” Crossing her arm, she frowned. “As far as baby daddy’s go… her father and I aren’t together. We never really were. He’s married, but we’re working on doing better with co-parenting now. It’s nothing more than that there.”

Her tone told me she didn’t want to discuss it, so I left it alone. Sitting quietly, I continued to eat as my phone vibrated repeatedly in my pocket. I had several missed calls from my grandmother, so I did the right thing and answered. “Yes, Sweets.”

“Oh my goodness, Andre Boudreaux! You had me worried sick!”

“Sweets… I’m fine.” I slid my napkin back over to Denim, pointing at the fridge for another sandwich. “I just needed some air. I’m—” I paused and glanced up at Denim as she got to work on my food. “With afriend.I’ll be back later. Are you and Pop okay?”

Hearing me refer to her as a friend caused Denim to grin. Being as though I disrupted her sleep for some bullshit, she could have the label for the night.

“Yes, yes… we’re fine. We just wanted to make sure you’re okay. I’ve never seen you so upset, baby.”

I stiffened at her words because the last thing I ever wanted to do was make my grandparents uncomfortable in my presence. They knew what I was capable of to some extent, but I never wanted them to feel as if I could commit such actions in their company.

“I’m sorry,” I said somberly. “It was never my intention to do that. We can talk in the morning if you’re asleep when I get back.”

“Okay, baby… that’s fine,” my grandmother said as Dee slid the second sandwich and a bag of Doritos across the counter. “I’m going to bed now since I know you’re okay. Adrian took your mother back to the airport about two hours ago.”

Saying nothing in response to that, I told my grandmother I loved her and would see her later. I was relieved to hear my mother had taken my advice by no longer being at the penthouse when I got back. I meant every word I’d said to her. If she ever tried me again, I’d end her myself.

“Everything okay?” Denim asked as she snapped me from my thoughts. “You’re quiet.”

“Family shit.” I shrugged and continued to eat. “I’ve been going through a lot.”

“You want to talk about it?” she asked and seemed genuinely interested as she propped up against the counter. “I may be a clerical administrator on paper, but I was a therapist in a past life. Would you feel better if we moved to the couch?”

Eyeing her breasts as they spilled from her robe, my eyes moved back to hers, causing her to drop her head and blush. She’d better be careful before she found herself fucked. “If we go to that couch, the only thing I want to talk about is you being still while you take this dick, love.” She gasped as she balled up a paper towel and threw it at me. “Maybe this time, the dick won’t cause you to black out.”

Scoffing, she stomped from the counter, and I couldn’t help but bend over in laughter. After finishing my food, I cleaned behind myself and went in search of her. It didn’t take long to find her on the couch watching television.

“You’re an asshole.” She rolled her eyes at me as I took a seat beside her. “Don’t touch me.”

“Lil’ Mama, don’t act like that.” I pulled her into my lap and took the remote from her hand. Finding SportsCenter, she groaned as highlights from today’s games were discussed. Rubbing her smooth thighs, a sense of calmness came over me. The tension of today’s events slowly faded, and I could feel myself relax. With her head on my shoulder, I could feel her body unwind before soft hums filled my ears. Peeking down, she appeared to be asleep.

“Growing up, I had a good life,” I rattled off as she snoozed in my lap. “My two-parent household was everything I could pray for. My parents and grandparents fought a lot over who was my favorite since I was an only child.” I couldn’t help but smile at the memories before continuing my ramble. “I always envied my father and cousins because they had siblings, and I was all alone. I had them, but I resented their bonds. My cousins are my best friends now, though, and I’ll never make light of our relationship. We sometimes fight, but those are my brothers, and I’ll do anything for them.” I sighed heavily as I threw my head back against the sofa. “My parents had a love that was like no other, and I often think what it would be like to have that same love.” I peered down at Denim as she stirred in my lap and got more comfortable. “That’s not in the cards for me, and it’s cool because I’m probably not equipped to love somebody enough to adjust my lifestyle, anyhow.”

I wondered what it would be if I had a wife and kids like my cousins, but I’m selfish. The life I live is one I don’t want to step away from. Work, my grandparents, and the Family would always come first, and I wouldn’t want to add another person to the roster. I also didn’t want to share who I truly was with anyone new—enough people knew who Andre Boudreaux really was.

“When my father died, my mother blamed me…” I shook my head at how our relationship had diminished before his death. “She hates me and wishes death on me every day. I love her and always will, but I have to let her and her accusations go for my own sanity.”

Massaging Denim’s scalp as she slept, she nuzzled into my chest. I admit it was nice to hold a woman so closely. Even though she was asleep, expressing my intimate thoughts aloud felt good.

“Psalm Chapter 34 Verse 18 says,The LORD is nigh unto them that are of a broken heart, and saveth such as be of a contrite spirit.”

Letting my mother go was the hardest thing I’d ever do, but it must be done. Closing my eyes, I prayed for her soul and mine as we entered into unknown territory. As I sat here and embraced Denim, a serene feeling of peace rolled over me. I did my part as her child. If my mother wanted this to be where our love for each other ended, so be it.

Me:

I love my mother.

Zoo:

I know it, bro.

Me:

---