Page 1 of Kingdoms of Tides and Twilight

Chapter One

Grayden didn't wait for the portal behind him to permanently close before turning his back on it. He couldn't shoulder the pain of seeing it destroyed and evaporating into the cool, thin air. The portal was his only link left to Renya. The finality of watching it disappear was unbearable. While he understood it had to be done to protect Renya, it didn't make it any easier. He'd never be able to find her again or bring her back. Even if his full powers were restored and he defeated Cressida, he wouldn't know where in time and space to retrieve her from.

Grayden knew Renya would come with him in a heartbeat if he could reach her. Seeing her Aunt Agatha gave her the closure she needed to stay in their world. But no. That evil witch of a queen had once again ruined his life.

He hated her. Grayden's jaw clenched, his hands balling into fists at his sides. The lump in his throat dissolved as heat crawled up his neck, flushing his face. His vision blurred for a moment, not from the tears that had threatened to fall, but from the red haze of fury that now consumed him. His chest heaved with each ragged breath, his pulse pounding in his ears like drums of war. Defeating Queen Cressida was previously the means to an end for him, not something he was looking forward to. He had to destroy her to save his world. But now...it was personal. Grayden would be the one to end her. He imagined the satisfaction he would feel, plunging his knife through her black heart. But even as he visualized it in his mind, the horror on her pale white face as he stopped her beating heart, there was no relief. Her death would never bring Renya home, the one thing he desired most.

With one last fleeting glimpse at the shimmering portal, he directed Lightning towards the lodge and took off, fighting the urge to look over his shoulder as he rode.

Grayden should have spent the ride back to his home planning and strategizing, trying to figure out how to keep his lands safe, but his mind wouldn't cooperate. Every time a solid idea came to him, it slithered away before he could catch it, like a slippery eel avoiding the net. All he could do was mourn the loss of Renya and the future he had been foolish enough to imagine for them. He had envisioned them safely at the lodge, her preparing for some gala ball. They used to hold balls all the time before his parents died. Renya would have been happy, conspiring with Selenia and reading by the fire in the library. At night, his bed would be hers and they would have fallen asleep in each other's arms.

Grayden scolded himself. He needed to stop that line of thinking. It would only lead to madness and irrefutable heartbreak.

He rode on, his eyes unseeing. However, as he approached a large snow drift, something black caught his eye. He stopped Lightning and dismounted, eyeing the strange parcel half-buried on the hill. Grayden sank to his knees and brushed the snow off it. His nose picked up the faintest trace of Renya. Heart pounding, he pulled a black leather bag out of the drift. This was hers. He examined the strange bag. It had a tag on it with her name. Renya Solaris. Grayden never knew her surname. Of course it was Solaris; it was obvious which fae line she belonged to.

She must have lost the bag when she came through the portal, before he found her in the forest. He crouched down lower and looked at the odd fastener on the satchel before realizing it slid down. He carefully opened it and saw some snow-white parchment with blue lines all over it, and what he assumed were writing utensils in the human world. There was a pocket mirror and some cosmetics. The bag still felt heavy after he emptied it, so he searched inside until he found a hidden pocket. Tucked safely away was an old and aging book. He lifted it carefully out of its hiding spot and read the cover.The Tale of Peter Rabbit. He flipped through the pages, reading bits here and there as he thumbed through it. It was a book of children's tales. The book must mean something to Renya if she brought it with her and hid it away so securely. Grayden carefully tucked the book inside his shirt next to his chest and threw the bag over his shoulder. He'd take these with him; there was no way he could leave any part of Renya in the forest. Grayden would hide the items in his room and remember her at night in the quiet moments he spent alone. He would mourn her loss for as long as he had breath in his lungs.

The journey home was a blur for Grayden. He couldn't remember seeing any of the trails and had no recollection of even passing through the village on his way up to the lodge. Luckily, Lightning knew where he was going because Grayden was not an active participant in getting them home.

When Grayden approached the near-empty courtyard, he saw Selenia waiting for him, her scarlet ringlets whipping around in the chilling wind. She ran over to him, tears wetting her eyes. Grayden slid off of Lightning and stood in front of her wordlessly, his eyes hollow and his strong shoulders sagging.

Selenia reached out her arms to him, and he let her pull him into a tight embrace. Grayden was afraid to speak, fearful his emotions would betray him, and he'd break down right there in the courtyard in front of his sister.

Yet he was grateful for Selenia. She shared his pain and would mourn the loss of Renya as well. The pair had become quite close while she was here, just as he had hoped and imagined.

Selenia lifted her head and looked at him.

“I'm so sorry, brother,” she said, the tears in her eyes threatening to overflow. “I'm sorry Brandle took her instead of me. I'm so sorry you had to send her back to her world. Jurel and Charly told me what transpired in the Sunset Land and I feel like it's all my fault.”

She tipped her face up to Grayden's before dropping it back to the ground. The snowflakes collected in the hood of her purple cloak. Grayden recognized it as the one Renya had worn to the Sky Lights Festival. His mind flashed back to that near-perfect evening as a ghost vision of Renya, resplendent in her midnight blue gown, flashed across his mind.

“You can't blame yourself, Selenia. Either way, the Shadow Queen was going to find out about Renya.” Grayden's voice caught in his throat, the single syllable of her name scraping against his vocal cords like sandpaper. He swallowed hard, fighting to maintain his composure as the taste of her name on his lips sent a sharp pang through his chest. His fingers curled into his palms, nails biting into flesh, as he forced out the rest of his words. Each syllable felt like a shard of glass, cutting him anew as he spoke aloud the name he'd only dared to whisper in his mind since she vanished. “I was a fool to think I could conceal her. I should have never taken her outside of the lodge. I should have sent her home the moment I found her. I shouldn't have stopped until I found a way to open a portal for her. I should have written to Queen Kalora and begged—”

“Grayden, you don't mean that,” Selenia said gently. “If you had sent her back sooner, you wouldn't have fallen in love with her.”

Grayden looked down at Selenia's sweet face. Her button nose was pink from the cold. “You know how I feel?” He kicked a piece of gravel in the yard, feeling a bit awkward about discussing his feelings towards Renya with Selenia.

“It was obvious to me,” she said. “Tumwalt and the others were too blind and busy to see it. But I could tell. What you felt for her was real. I know it hurts now, but you don't regret loving her, do you?”

Grayden thought of the way Renya's golden hair had rested softly against his chest in the tent after she’d stitched him up. He remembered their passionate kiss in the hallway before Selenia had interrupted them. He reflected back to their final moments together in the snow cave and the desperation he had felt to make her his. No. He wouldn't take those moments back for anything.

Selenia smiled at him sadly, understanding the memories brought him both happiness and despair. Grayden put his arm around his sister, and they walked into the lodge together, large flakes of snow drifting around them.

“How's Phillippe?” Grayden asked, eager to try and get his mind off his emotional turmoil.

“He's doing a lot better,” Selenia replied, taking off her cloak and hanging it on a slender hook by the solid oak door. Grayden's eyes fixated on the purple cloak for a few seconds before looking back at his sister. “He's already been in the yard practicing. He said he's incredibly out of shape and it's your fault.”

“Of course, he'd blame it on me.” Perhaps he'd spar with Phillippe tonight. He needed to throw himself back into ruling his lands. He was willing to give it all up for Renya, but now she was gone, and he must protect his people at any cost.

A rush of guilt suddenly rippled through him. Grayden had been ready to sacrifice his birthright for her life in the Sunset Land. Is that what love was? Did it make you foolish and impulsive? But even now, he knew he would still make the trade.

At least she was safe, back with her aunt. Agatha said she was going to take Renya somewhere warm. They couldn't go back to California, she told Grayden, but she mentioned some other place that was warm and tropical. He imagined Renya in the bikini she described to him, at the beach, warm sand between her toes and the sun shining down on her. The thought brought him some relief, thinking about her safe and loved in the human realm. He'd cling to those images of her and write stories about her life in his mind, just as she did in the nightmare dungeon to keep herself sane. Perhaps it would save his sanity, too. She had already saved him in so many other ways.

Grayden gave Selenia another warm embrace before heading up the stairs. No one followed him, and it seemed odd to him that Tumwalt wasn't there to greet him as soon as he returned. Tumwalt always had words for him and papers to sign. Grayden wondered if Selenia told everyone to give him some space. He was grateful for it, no matter how it came about. Grayden wasn't willing to talk about it with anyone who didn't know how truly painful it was.

He stopped in the hallway outside of his room, turning toward the bedchamber that was Renya's for the short time she was here. He looked up and down the hall, feeling embarrassed about intruding. But she wasn't coming back to claim it, and at some point Doria would have to go through the room. Before that happened, he wanted one last glimpse of it. It would hurt, but he wanted to get the pain over with so he could attempt to move on.

The second he pushed open the door, the sweet smell of lilacs and vanilla hit him. He saw the cream blanket she slept with, and a nightdress Doria laid out that Renya would never wear. He reached out his hand, and with nimble fingers he followed the line of pink ribbon at the collar. Swallowing hard, he tried to compel himself to walk out of this room and summon Doria to clean it out. But he just couldn't help himself, no matter how painful it was.

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