Page 37 of Kingdoms of Tides and Twilight

The comment caught Selenia off guard. “Why not? I want to be able to defend myself, to fight alongside you and my brothers if needed.”

Jurel's eyes darkened slightly. “It's not a woman's place to be on the battlefield, Selenia. Your brothers would never allow it, and neither would I.”

Selenia felt a flicker of irritation at his words. “I'm not some delicate flower that needs protection,” she argued. “I'm just as capable as any man here.”

Jurel's expression softened, but there was a patronizing edge to his smile that made Selenia's stomach twist uncomfortably. “I know you're strong, Selenia. But there are other ways you can contribute, ways that don't put you in harm's way.”

Selenia bit back a retort, instead focusing on placing another arrow. As she drew back the string, she tried to channel her frustration into her aim. The arrow flew straight and true, embedding itself near the center of the target with a satisfying thud.

“Excellent shot!” Jurel exclaimed, genuine pride in his voice. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into a brief, celebratory embrace. Selenia melted into his touch, her earlier irritation momentarily forgotten.

As they continued practicing, Selenia found her thoughts drifting to the future. She imagined herself by Jurel's side, no longer just the little sister of his commander but a true partner. In her mind's eye, she saw them facing challenges together, building a life in the Snow Lands.

“What are you thinking about?” Jurel asked, noticing her distant expression.

Selenia hesitated, suddenly feeling shy. “I was just wondering...what do you think will happen after all this is over? After we defeat the Shadow Queen?”

Jurel's face grew serious, his gaze fixed on the distant mountains. “I suppose we'll need to rebuild, strengthen our defenses. There will always be threats to face, enemies at our borders.”

“But what about...us?” Selenia pressed, her heart pounding. “Have you ever thought about settling down, starting a family?”

A flicker of discomfort passed over Jurel's features. “Selenia,” he began, his tone cautious, “you know my duty is to the Snow Lands, to your brothers. I can't afford distractions.”

Selenia felt as if she'd been doused with ice water. “Am I a distraction?” she asked, hating how small her voice sounded.

Jurel sighed, running a hand through his hair. “That's not what I meant. I just...my life is here, in the camp, training soldiers and defending our borders. It's all I've ever known, all I want to know.”

Selenia nodded, trying to hide the hurt his words caused. She had always dreamed of adventure, of seeing the world beyond the Snow Lands. The thought of being confined to a military camp for the rest of her life felt suffocating.

“I understand,” she said, forcing a smile. “Let's keep practicing. I want to hit the bullseye before we're done.”

As they resumed their lesson, Selenia threw herself into the task with renewed vigor. She focused on the physical sensations—the tension in the bowstring, the strain in her muscles, the biting cold of the wind on her face. It was easier than dwelling on the growing sense that perhaps she and Jurel wanted very different things from life.

The sun was beginning to dip towards the horizon when Jurel called an end to their practice. Selenia's arms ached pleasantly from the exertion, and despite the emotional turmoil churning inside her, she felt a sense of accomplishment.

“You did well today,” Jurel said as they packed up the equipment. “You're a quick learner.”

Selenia smiled, warmth blooming in her chest at his praise. “I had a good teacher,” she replied, looking up at him through her lashes.

Jurel's expression softened, and for a moment, Selenia thought he might kiss her. Her heart raced as he leaned in closer, his hand coming up to brush a stray lock of hair from her face. But at the last second, he seemed to think better of it, pulling back with a rueful smile.

“We should head back,” he said, his voice rough. “It'll be time for the evening meal soon.”

As they walked back towards the camp, Selenia found herself hyper-aware of the space between them. It was as if an invisible barrier had sprung up, keeping them just out of reach of each other. She longed to bridge that gap, to take his hand in hers, but something held her back.

“Selenia,” Jurel said suddenly, stopping in his tracks. “I...I'm glad you're here. Even if I didn't show it when you first arrived.”

Selenia's heart leapt at his words. “Really?” she asked, hope blossoming in her chest.

Jurel nodded, a conflicted expression on his face. “It's complicated. Having you here, it makes me want things I can't have, things that don't fit with the life I've chosen.”

“Maybe you don't have to choose,” Selenia suggested, taking a step closer to him. “Maybe we could find a way to make it work, to have both.”

For a moment, Jurel looked tempted. His eyes searched hers, filled with a longing that made Selenia's breath catch. But then he shook his head, the walls coming back up behind his eyes.

“It's not that simple,” he said softly. “We have responsibilities, duties to fulfill. We can't always put our own desires first.”

Selenia felt as if she'd been punched in the gut, but she forced herself to nod. “I understand,” she said, even though part of her wanted to scream that she didn't, that she couldn't accept a life defined solely by duty and obligation.

---