Page 66 of Fault Line

Now, with Rai’s words swirling around inside my head, my thoughts are fully consumed. For too long, I’ve been in denial about my true feelings for Kaia. But now, I know it’s time to confront them head-on.

Is it possible that she’s starting to feel the same, or am I just imagining things?

I nearly miss my door as I stumble inside my room, collapsing onto the bed. This past week has been a whirlwind of taking care of Kaia, doubling up on notes, and pushing through our grueling practice schedule.

And now, the weight of it all has finally caught up to me.

23

KAIA

After watchingHolden leave this morning, I curled up in bed well into the midmorning. For me, it’s a luxury I don’t often allow. And now, hours later, I’m still sitting here smiling at nothing, mindlessly kicking my feet, cheeks heating at the thought of waking up beside him again.

But that’s when it hits me. Like a ton of bricks. Like a train that just ran me over. Like a goddamn hurricane.

I have a crush. An actual, bona fide crush on Holden Becker.

I mean, it’s not like I didn’t know I was attracted to him before. But this is different. This is like, butterflies in my stomach, heart racing, can’t stop thinking about him kind of crush. And it’s freaking me out.

I mean, sure, he’s ridiculously good-looking. And he’s great in bed. But it’s more than that. It’s the way his laughter hits me right in the fucking chest. The way he touches me, soft and gentle when I need it and rough when I don’t. The way he leaves me those goofy little notes in the morning before he sneaks out.

This is bad. Really bad. I don’t do crushes. The last couple of guys I’ve dated have been a complete nonissue, mostly because I didn’t actually give a shit about them. Being with them never carried the risk of real distraction.

But this is uncharted territory for me.

Maybe it’s just a fluke. Maybe I’m just overthinking things like usual. But then I remember the way I asked him to stay the night, the way he held me, comforted me this past week. And when we woke up together, I didn’t want him to leave.

Fucking hell. I really, genuinely like the guy, don’t I?

I groan, throwing myself back onto the bed. This is not how things are supposed to be. I’m supposed to be the one in control, the one who doesn’t catch feelings. But here I am, falling head first for the golden boy, with his warm, brown eyes and the whitest fucking smile I’ve ever seen.

It’s like I’m in high school all over again, awkward and nervous and hoping he likes me back. It’s silly, really, considering the fact that his dick was inside me just a few hours ago.

I huff a frustrated sigh, burying my face in a pillow.

The rest of the day is a flurry of trying to shut him out of my brain. I distract myself with laundry, cleaning, and reorganizing my bookshelf. But no matter what I do, I can’t shake the thought of him. Every time I catch myself humming, dancing, daydreaming, I force myself to snap out of it.

I can’t let this thing between us consume any more of my time.

But then, just as I’m starting to feel like maybe I can handle this newfound infatuation, my phone lights up with a text.

Holden

hey, we’re having people over after the game tonight. wanna come by?

My stomach flutters at the thought of seeing him again so soon, but I know I can’t give in. This isn’t what we agreed upon. In fact, it’s far from it. I need to create some semblance of distance between us while I still can.

Kaia

sorry, can’t make it

Holden

oh, okay. that’s too bad. was hoping to see you tonight

I can practically hear the disappointment dripping from his words, and it sends a pang of guilt straight to my gut. I’m sure he’s well aware that I’ll be sitting at home doing nothing instead.

Kaia

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