Page 92 of Fault Line

I mull it over for a while longer, hesitant to disturb her if she’s genuinely asleep in her apartment, but eventually, I decide to throw caution to the wind and head over anyway. The need to see her and find solace in her presence trumps my hesitation.

I park my car and walk up to her door, my heart pounding with every step. But when I knock, Lizzie answers, looking awkward and put out.

“Hey, is Kaia home?” I ask, failing at my attempts to sound casual.

She hesitates, clearly wary about letting me in. She looks over her shoulder and then back at me before finally rolling her eyes.

“Screw it,” she mutters, stepping aside and allowing me to enter. “She’s in her room.”

I make my way down the hallway, and as I push open her bedroom door, my heart lodges itself into my throat. There, curled up in bed, is my girlfriend lying beside another man. A thousand thoughts race through my brain, and a sharp pain sears through my gut. But as I take in the scene more closely, I notice they’re both clothed, barely touching.

Fucking hell.

I highly doubt Kaia would even have the capacity to cheat on me. And I’m also aware that she and Elio have always just been close friends. But seeing them together like this, when I needed her to be there for me, is an unbearable feeling.

I thought she needed space and time to work through her stress and anxiety alone, so I’ve been granting her that, but it’s clear now that she needed someone to be there for her last night. And that person, sadly, wasn’t me.

With a surge of emotion, I slam the door shut, marching back through the apartment, unable to handle this right now. But Kaia—clearly woken up by my fit of irritation—chases after me. Her hair is wild, and her eyes are still groggy with sleep.

“Beck, wait,” she calls out, her voice thick with concern and confusion.

I hesitate, torn between the desire to confront her and the need to distance myself from the hurt. But as she reaches me, her eyes filled with a mix of worry and sincerity, I’m unable to turn away.

“Please, Beck,” she pleads, her voice cracking, “can I just explain?”

My chest is tight, my heart heavy. I’m still seconds away from walking out her front door when a small voice inside me convinces me to stay. This deserves a real conversation, and I refuse to let her off the hook so easily.

“Look, I’m kinda going through some shit right now, and this is the last thing I needed to deal with,” I say, my voice shaking slightly.

“What do you mean?”

“You know what?” I say, exasperated. “Never mind. I thought I could do this with you, I really did. But I just can’t.”

Her eyes widen as she runs a ragged hand through her hair. “So, that’s it, then? We’re done?”

“No, we’re not fucking done. I’m not breaking up with you, Karras.”

She worries her teeth over her bottom lip, shoulders slumping. “You’re not?”

“No,” I say firmly. “I really, really like you. Do you know that? And all I fucking want is to be there for you. Your person—the one you come to when you’re in need, the one you call in the middle of the night when you can’t sleep. And I thought that’s where we were headed, together. But somehow, you’ve defaulted to pushing me away while letting Elio in. And I’m starting to think that it will always be that way.”

“I don’t want it to be that way, though.” She reaches for me, but I step back, evading her touch. “I want to let you in.”

“Then why don’t you?” I ask, exasperated.

She sighs, long and heavy. “Because it’s hard.”

“It’s hard.” I let out a humorless snort. “Come on, Karras. That’s not a reason. I know for a fact that you can do hard things. You’re the hardest worker I know, after all.”

“Maybe I’m just not used to all this.” Her voice cracks. “Feeling this way about someone. Maybe I’m just scared.”

“Of what? I told you I want you just as you are.”

She stares down at the floor, avoiding my gaze as she mumbles, “I know, but that was before.”

“Fuck, Kaia,” I rasp, unable to keep my emotions in check. “You’ve been treating this relationship like we’re living on a fault line, ready to destruct at a moment’s notice. It doesn’t make me feel very good, especially when I’ve done nothing but try and stick beside you. So if you’re looking for an out from me, I’m not gonna give you one.”

“I don’t want an out,” she promises, eyes pleading.

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