Page 118 of Savage Hearts

I turned off the light and climbed under the covers, pulling them over my head, closing my eyes, and trying to go to sleep.

Only five minutes in, and I found myself shifting positions on the bed, moving to my side, and looking out the window.

What the fuck were they doing to me?

If this was some psychological warfare they decided to wage against me…

Well, they were winning.

I rolled to my other side and stared at the wall. The window let in enough light that I could see the shadows from the outside world.

My eyes traced along the outline of a tree branch, trying to bring my focus and thoughts away from where they were currently heading.

Groaning in frustration, I sat up on the bed and looked around the empty room.

I had thought either Silas or Maverick would come by.

I had…hoped.

And even the thought was pissing me off.

I put off my wanting to see them as my own loneliness reflected onto me.

In some ways, this was worse than living at the club, because at least my leash had been longer. I was given some freedom to drive away from the clubhouse if I needed. It didn’t matter that my car had a GPS tracking device that my dad could access at any time.

It didn’t matter that he threatened to kill me if I ran away a second time.

It didn’t matter, because I was allowed to interact with other people. Not that I had friends, considering I had been an outcast at my high school after my date with Nicholas, when he went back to school and told everyone about the “creepy” relationship I had with my uncle.

Never mind the fact that I never wanted to have any sort of relationship with Sebastian, or that I had never told him about my date in the first place. I was still isolated as the rumors spread like wildfires.

This was much different. In this house, I was trapped.

The guards were stoic and feared the brothers, so they left me alone.

Rachel tried to talk to me, but I wasn’t ready to get close to a woman who could turn a blind eye to me being taken. I didn’t miss the affection in her eyes for the brothers, either.

She loved them, despite the fact they weren’t good men.

And here I was, craving the presence of two of them, andnotbeing disgusted at the fact that the other one had left me a… present.

I was?—

I was confused.

Why couldn’t they be like my dad? Why couldn’t they be cruel outright, instead of holding me on a precipice of stupid hope that they might be different?

That this wasn’t all a beautiful, cruel lie?

That the softness I found in Maverick’s gaze could be real, or the affection in Silas’ touch could be true? Or Hell, even the fact that Killian had been absent, almost as if he was scared of—me.

I didn’t know what to think or feel.

I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight.

Not until I did something about this restlessness in me.

The vibrator’s presence felt hot beneath the bed, as if calling to me.

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