Page 154 of Creep

The. Mob.

That sound like a fucking suicide mission to me.

How stupid.

I pushed off from the bench and walked over to the bathroom. He was already in the shower by then. His eyes were closed as he let the water rain down on him. I didn’t let myself think as I pulled off my own clothes and walked over to the shower, opening the glass door and joining him. I knew he was aware of me, but he didn’t turn around to look at me.

I used that time to take in his muscular back, feeling something inside me stir.

He had always been beautiful. It didn’t matter what I thought about him or how I felt. The fact had always been just how beautiful… how flawed Mael was. And he was mine. Every inch of his tattooed, scarred body was mine.

I leaned forward and kissed his back.

I felt more than heard his sigh. I kissed him once more and wrapped my arms around his waist, holding him close.

“I never had to explain myself to anyone.”

“And you don’t like it?” I guessed.

He surprised me when he said, “No, it’s not that. I just realized having someone I needed to explain myself to also means there is someone at home expecting me to make it safely back to her.”

“And you, what? Never took your safety into consideration?”

His nonanswer was loud. Had he always been this reckless?

I turned him around until he was looking at me.

“It’s your fault,” I said. “You made me depend on you. You made me need you. So you’re going to come home to me, no matter what.”

His eyes softened, and he nodded. “I’ll come home to you, no matter what.”

“And you’ll save all those women… those people.”

“I’m not the hero in this story, sweetheart.”

I shook my head. He could tell me he didn’t care, and I was starting to believe him, but I knew he cared about me.

He cared what I thought about all this.

“I’ll do my best,” he said finally, and I knew that was all he was going to give me. I shot him a small smile, and he seemed to freeze.

It took him a moment to catch his bearings, and then he was grabbing the shampoo bottle and helping me clean up, even though I had taken a shower the night before.

I let him take care of me.

The shower was quick. Mael didn’t linger, even if I wished he did. I let my eyes roam up and down his body while he washed himself. The suds streamed down his skin, covering up his ink briefly.

My eyes came back to the line of numbers on his ribs.

37654

I had thought it was interesting when I first saw it, but now, given what I know…

I reached and traced the numbers with my fingers.

“How old were you when you got this?” I asked as the thought came to my mind and wouldn’t leave me alone.

Please let me be wrong about this.