Page 96 of Creep

LIA

What if I was wrong?

Then I would be ruining a good thing with a good man for someone terrible. Someone horrible. Someone who couldn’t approach me like a normal man and instead, stalked me for weeks like a fucking creep.

But the suspicion grew.

Sometimes, I thought Mael moved like my stalker did. Sometimes, I thought he felt like my stalker.

That would explain why I felt inexplicably drawn to my stalker. I was already falling for Mael. Would it be so hard to fall for the darker side of him? At least, that was my thought when I let my stalker fuck me. When I let him kiss me. When I…

But after spending the night with Mael, the doubt started to creep back in. What if I was wrong? And if I was wrong, it meant I had cheated on Mael with a man who had been stalking me, no less.

I closed my eyes, hating the way I was feeling and the confusing emotions I experienced about a million times a day.

What was happening to me?

This was getting to be too much, and I didn’t know what I could do anymore.

I drove up to my childhood home and pulled into the driveway.

Dad wasn’t home.

The lights weren’t on. I didn’t want to go home, not when there was a chance I could run into my stalker.

I shook my head. It wasn’t a chance but a sure thing. If I went home, he would be there tonight, and I was feeling weak and defenseless.

And going back to Mael’s place…

I didn’t know how to face him… not until I figured out what the hell was really going on. Why was I feeling like this for both men?

I shut off the engine and got out of the car.

When I felt lost or unsure of my footing, I usually spent the night in my childhood home. It always reminded me of simpler times—when there were no expectations of me other than to get good grades and be good.

Now I didn’t know anymore.

I walked inside, taking in the familiar sight of everything comforting to me, bypassing all the family photos hanging on the wall, and made my way up to my childhood room.

Dad had kept it the same even when I moved out seven years ago and had no intention of moving back home. I was glad he did. I didn’t need any more new changes in my life. I placed my bag down on the floor and sat on my bed, looking around the place.

I didn’t take everything with me when I moved. In fact, I left most of my cherished mementos here, afraid I might lose them if I moved them. There were drawings Caden and I had done when we were little because Dad worked a lot, so we spent a lot of time with each other. There was the occasional nanny here and there, but mostly, it was just Caden and me.

And now, it was just me.

I stood from the bed and walked over to my walk-in closet, sitting down on the floor and running my hand around the floorboard before I heard a squeak. I paused my hand there and pushed down until it loosened, and I was able to get it open.

A secret only Caden and I knew about. We would put all of our most prized possessions down here growing up, sharing them with each other. I hadn’t dug around in there since Caden died, mostly because I couldn’t bring myself to do it, knowing whatever I left here would remain untouched until I decided to move it. And something about that thought just made me sad.

God, I wished he were here right now.

I would tell him about my stalker. And Mael. And about Victoria and Leo.

That last one would have surprised him as much as it did me.

I would mostly tell him how much I missed him.

How much I loved him.

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