Page 89 of Marry Me

Mara took a step back, placed her hands on her hips, and nodded. “It’s totally okay. Maybe we can exchange numbers. Try this another time?” Her kind eyes overflowed with hope. She was a nice person, and Megan felt awful for suggesting they go somewhere together, following her home, and then bailing.

She sighed. “I’m going to be honest and tell you that this is not the best time for me. Things are complicated.”

“Ah. Well. I get that, too.”

“But thank you for the conversation, the company.” She inclined her head, sheepish. “And more.”

Mara opened the door for her. “Anytime, and I can honestly say I mean that.”

She was grateful for the understanding. Megan let herself out, feeling like maybe it was time to face facts. She was miserable and couldn’t take much more. She walked the handful of blocks back to her place with a lot on her mind. Because the late spring air was warm, she took an extra block, gaining momentum in her conviction with each step. She could call Ally. Would that be so horrible—to admit that she missed her, and loved her, and had made a horrible mistake? Maybe Allison would tell her to go fuck herself and hang up the phone. Sheshook her head. That wasn’t her style. And the only way to find out how she’d react was to pick up the phone and call her.

Maybe.

She stood in front of her building and stared up at it.

“Nice night,” Chip said. “Good for working things out.” He tapped his temple.

She stared at him. “How did you know that’s what I was doing?”

“It’s my job to know my people. Heading in?” He opened the door.

“You’re too good at your job.” She accepted the offer and passed through the door, feeling the swift blast of cool air from the newly turned on air conditioning.

“You know what I always tell myself when something weighs me down? Sleep on it, and if you feel the same in the morning, you really mean it.”

She paused and turned back. “That’s actually really good advice. You know what? You’re getting extra cookies for the holidays this year. Maybe even booze.”

“Let’s hope you still feel that way in the morning.”

She laughed, already feeling lighter, like she had a sense of direction after so long. Maybe this was the time in her life when she needed to be brave, take a stand, and declare herself no matter how daunting it might seem. She stared at herself in the mirror before bed and really looked herself square in the eyes. She was only on this Earth once, and there wouldn’t be any second chances. She had to take control of her life and wrestle it away from the fear of failure that had haunted her since she was a kid. So what if she failed? At least she’d know she’d tried, and wasn’t Allison worth it? “God, yes,” she told the mirror with tears pooling in her eyes. “Definitely.”

When she awoke the next morning, everything felt lighter. The sun shone brightly as she exited her building and ushered her into the world, hot coffee in hand. She popped on her sunglasses and smiled, prepared for whatever was ahead. She felt stronger and well equipped, ready to take her life back into her own hands.

When she arrived at the office, Demi handed her the paper and a handful of messages, which she would tackle after email.

“You look great,” Lourdes said, offering a nod of approval as Megan made her way down the hall in her heels and gray suit. “Million bucks.”

“Thank you,” she said and grinned back. When she arrived at her office, she found Cade waiting outside.

“Good morning, sir.”

“Good morning.” Though his face said anything but.

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah.” A pause. “Yes. But I wanted to check in with you about something that you may already know all about. If so, please just ignore me.”

She eyed him as he shifted his weight and thrust his hands into his pockets. He was nervous. Very unlike Cade. “Come on it. What’s going on?”

He did so and closed her office door behind him, which told her this was a sensitive subject matter. She wondered if he’d lost a client. It was unfortunate, but it happened, especially if the couple’s aesthetic wasn’t gelling with their own style and approach. Having been there, she was ready to talk him down once she heard him out.

Cade took a seat. “I had dinner with my friend Jason Sontera last night.”

“Oh, from Vows and Veils?” The competing agency was slightly smaller and took a more boutique approach to event planning but was well respected in the community. She often sent referrals there herself when Soiree was booked up.

He nodded. “He told me they’d taken on a new and exciting client—they would be handling the Carmichael wedding.”

She paused midsmile, dissecting the words for their meaning, but feeling like her brain was woefully stuck. “Jeff?”