Page 50 of Dream a Little Dream

Chapter Fifteen

A Gut Feeling

In a donut shop, life feels a whole lot sweeter. That’s why I made a point of swinging in for a dozen for the break room at least once a week. And though I wouldn’t say I’m the wisest person to ever live, there is one truth I stand by: There is nothing that can compete with the aroma of freshly fried dough, sugar, and spices. That’s why I consumed more donuts than was probably advisable.

Amazin’ Glazin’ happened to be my very favorite business in all of Dreamer’s Bay. Lulu and Peggy co-owned the place, trained their focus on one thing and did it really well. With artisan donut shops popping up all over the country, Amazin’ stuck with the classics, capturing our hearts with their greasy glazed masterpieces.

I stood in the doorway and let the heavenly smell wash over me. I refused to rush, closing my eyes and enjoying that precious first moment. The dining room sounded half full, as the sounds of satisfied customers chatting quietly filled the space. “Savanna’s here,” I heard Peggy call to Lulu, who spent most mornings in the kitchen, making the goods. “And she’s off the crutches.”

“Is she off that new ER doctor, too?”

I opened my eyes and stalked to the counter to confront the two women who had become my friends over the years. They were too busy air-fiving to notice. Both Peggy and Lulu were in their sixties and a true comedy act, playing off each other and their customers in that effortless way not many could master. “I’d act offended, but I don’t think it would bother you two.”

“Nope. We’re selling you donuts either way,” Peggy said, hands on the back of her hips. She wore her customary white apron withthe red lettering in line with the shop’s cozy, classic vibes. I gazed at the display case in reverence. Their award-winning glazed, chocolate frosted, sprinkles, and the classic jelly donut were the stars of the show. The apple fritter was a star in its own right, and I’d be back for it next week. The coffee at the shop was standard coffee, served from a pot that offered a gentle hum. No giant espresso machine to be seen on the pristine countertops. The flour on Lulu’s cheek was reserved for the kitchen, visible through a large square window where she slid trays of the freshly fried donuts through to Peggy.

“What’ll it be, Little Miss Kisses Women in Bars?” Peggy asked with a smirk.

“You know too much.”

“Just the important bits. Gossip is the jam on my toast.” She slid a strand of imaginary hair behind her ear like some kind of a sugar-coated victory lap. She’d stopped dying her hair a few years back, and her now silvery locks were pulled back in a tight ponytail. Lulu kept hers short and curly.

“The higher the hair, the closer to God,” Lulu would always say. Then she’d wink at you. “But I hang out with the devil more often. Don’t tell my mama.”

In response to Peggy’s question, I studied the menu as if I didn’t have it entirely memorized. Still riding the high of the night before at Ronnie Roo’s, I decided to splurge a little. “A dozen glazed. A fan favorites bag. And a chocolate frosted for me to eat right here in this establishment like the sugar sinner I am.”

“The warmer the better, I always say,” Peggy quipped. “And these gentlemen are fresh. Prepare for your little piece of heaven in South Carolina.”

As she rang me up, I shifted my weight, wondering if I was honestly about to go there. “Speaking of romance, how’s your love life been lately?” Damn. I’d just gone and done it. Can of worms opened.

“Well, I’ll tell you right off. Jake hasn’t brought me flowers in over a year, but he visits me daily so we can argue about the best way to mow a lawn. If you feel like arguing, too, he’s right over there sippin’ on his coffee.”

I turned automatically, and sure enough, there he sat. Jacob Kielbasa. Jake to everyone who knew him. My first time seeing him since learning the truth about my biology. I went still, unsure how to feel, what to do. He sat at a table by himself with a cup of coffee in front of him in a tan diner mug. A newspaper folded in half sat off tothe side while he chatted with Chaz Schumacher from the garage and Tim Newton from the bait and tackle shop, both seated one table over. It was the most casual scene in the world. This was likely their standard morning, but nothing felt standard about it to me.

“Savanna, you’ve gone white as a sheet,” Peggy said, handing over my two big bags and one smaller one. “You need some water or a chair?”

“No. I’m fine. I just”—I turned back to her absently—“need to do something. I think.”

The joking between us set aside, Peggy regarded me sincerely. “Then you go on ahead and do it, sugar.” Her words were quiet and encouraging. Did she know? Didhe? I nodded and walked into the dining area like someone sleepwalking, pulled along on an invisible string toward Jake’s table until I stood alongside it.

The three men, noticing me, paused their conversation. The world moved into slow motion and my senses went into overdrive. I was hugely aware of the soft clinking of silverware being gathered, the aroma of the fresh pot of coffee coming on, and the feel of my own nails digging into my palm.Get it together.

Jake turned, likely curious about the purpose of my presence. Other than occasional pleasantries, generally lasting ten seconds at the market or a town gathering, when had we ever had a true conversation? He offered a smile. “Hey there, Savanna. What’s new?”

I didn’t say anything because the three different sentences I had floating around in my brain all seemed inadequate. I was nervous and stripped of my traditional interpersonal skill set like one of those bad dreams where you realized you hadn’t attended class all semester and knew nothing for the big test. I opened my mouth, hoping the words would take over. They didn’t. I was nervous and humiliated.

“Why don’t you sit down a minute?” Jake said, concern lacing his features. He had brown eyes like me. His were soft, which had to have served him well back in his days on the police force. I bet people trusted him. Right now, I did.

“Okay,” I managed to say.

His gaze hadn’t strayed, and Tim and Chaz had struck up a conversation at their own table, giving us privacy. “You doing all right today? Can I get you a cup of coffee to go with your donut?” That’s right, I had my single donut, meant to be a treat to me this morning. Forgotten now, in favor of a bigger moment.

“I think you knew my mother,” I said, barely above a whisper. Itwas almost as if I was afraid to say the words any louder for fear of shaking the very universe that was propping me up.

“I did,” he said without hesitation, nodding, never breaking eye contact. His silver hair feathered back into neat layers, thick like mine. His eyes were brown and wrinkles creased his face, most prominently around his eyes. He was handsome, one of those men who wore his age well. “She was a great girl.Woman, I mean. I’m so sorry we lost her.”

“I think she loved you once upon a time.”

He took a moment before answering; a slight hesitation made him look away. “I like to think she did. We had a little something going at one point.” He took a deep breath. “I was older than she was, and life was complicated at the time.” His eyes were clouded with either sadness or regret.

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