Page 55 of Hate Game

“Malice, you run so hot. Do you mind if I warm my cold feet between yours?”

I know that voice. It’s Cassie. How dare he break one of his dad’s rules by bringing a girl over? I yank the door open, not caring what I’ll see on the other side.

He and Cassie are on the bed, resting against the headboard. She is snuggled up to him, her legs tangled with his and her feet between his. Have they not heard of blankets? Jesus.

He arches a dark brow. “Rue. What can I do you for?” His gaze drops to my fists at my sides. Malice smirks. I am ready to tear into him, but the books strewn over the covers catch my attention.

Did he bring Cassie over for a study session? What the…? I open my mouth and then close it. I rush out of his room and into mine. I grab his laptop that he’s given me permission to use and set it next to the textbooks.

“Having this might help.” I back up towards the door. “Thank you, Cassie, for helping Malice.” Cassie is in our second, third, and fifth periods. I close the door behind me.

Loud music blares from the bedroom, and something random Red said about Malice takes away all the good from seeing the textbooks on Malice’s bed. Red said Malice played his music loud to drown out the girls’ moans and screams of pleasure. After he makes them come so hard they can’t speak a coherent word, he turns off the music.

I can’t bear to be around when the silence takes over. I grab my headphones, blankets, and a pillow and climb the ladder to the rooftop. I was wrong about Malice and everything that’s happened between us.

The quiet walk in the cemetery. I felt such a connection with him. And he cared whether I was warm enough. The jealousy in his voice when he asked about Isaac. A guy wouldn’t be jealous unless he cared, right?

I put together a makeshift bed with the blankets, crawl beneath them, and stare up at the stars with my headphones on. My music drowns out Malice’s that filters from his cracked bedroom window.

What is the antonym of love? Hate. What is the antonym of regret? I turn on my side and curl into myself.

Nothing good, that’s what. I am my mom’s biggest regret. Malice regrets making love to me because of what happened. He wants to talk about our baby. Will I ever be ready? Will he stop hating on me if we talk? Whether we talk or not, it doesn’t take away what’s happening on the floor beneath me.

Tired of seeing Malice touching and kissing Cassie in my head, I go over the terms for me to be done with my employment: grades above a B in all his classes, no parties at his place, two good deeds, and getting a job.

Malice said his place is his sanctuary and not a frat house. Translation: no parties. That’s an easy one to check off the list. He’s not supposed to see a girl until after he finds a job, but I’ll let that one slide. Cassie can help with his grades, though my chest aches just thinking of him spending more time with her.

Malice says he’s already doing two good deeds. What are they? I’ll cheat and ask Trace. Getting a job is a tough one. Malice isn’t in a hurry to find a job when his parents are paying him a weekly allowance.

Malice said no to working at the auto parts store. Shay works there, and Malice refuses to associate with any of Red’s friends.

What a snob. Shay is the nicest guy, and it would do Malice good to get to know a guy who could be his quarterback at DU in case Seven decides to attend a college elsewhere.

Will Leigh follow him to another college or state? Leigh said she and Sorrow applied to DU, and Trace too. He mentioned it when we talked about life after graduation.

It’s easy talking with Trace. When Trace leaves Cambridge, I won’t be hurt or feel abandoned. I can’t say the same for Malice. Malice leaving will break my heart. I’ll always wonder what he’s doing and who he’s with.

The only way to get over him is to stop feeling any ounce of love for him. I’ve been in love with him since the day Red introduced us. How does anyone get over their first love?

Case in point: Red. He is still hung up on his first love, Olivia. Who can I ask? Mason would know. I’m certain he’s fallen in and out of love several times. I’ll ask him how he did it, and then I’ll share Mason’s wisdom with Red.

Red hasn’t said what he’ll do after graduation, but knowing him, he’ll move to Dumas to be closer to his brother, Midnight, and their cousin, Dare.

Those two are a pain in the butt, but they’re the nicest, coolest guys. Red said I can get into DU with my financial needs alone.

But do I fit in? What if my compulsion to steal takes over? With as many students as there are and being in a new town, anything can go wrong, and where there is wrongness, there will be the opportunity for me to cause destruction and disruption.

Riley said she stopped with the thievery, but it’s difficult for me to believe her. How can someone stop a habit born from survival?

I roll onto my back and stare at the night sky. Clouds roll in and hide the stars and the moon. It’s so dark. Is it quiet too? I’ve gone through four songs on my playlist. I pull the headphone to the side and listen. Quiet.

I sneak back into my bedroom. On my way down the ladder, I notice Malice’s motorcycle is gone. He must be taking Cassie home. I check my messages on my cell phone for any communication from Red. He hasn’t texted since we parted ways at Isaac’s place. I can’t stand that he is angry with me.

We’ve fought before but made up after twenty-four hours. A week is not okay. I text him.

Me: Hey grump a lump

BFF: wrong number

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