Page 5 of Alpha Bully

My judgment would be questioned—something I cannot allow.

Those weeks we spent together with the rest of the pack occupied by the tournament are embedded in my mind. I felt like someone really understood me for the first time. Really saw me. And then I destroyed it.

I wonder what she would make of the man I’ve become, or if she would even recognize me. I know I have to force myself to rejoin the conversation, even though my heart isn’t in it. I have a pack to protect and a job to do. The rest will have to wait.

“Are you even listening?” I’m vaguely aware of Tristen’s voice.

“Sorry, what?” I feign interest, “I was just thinking about my patrol rotations.”

He gives me a sideways look but doesn’t press it. “I said, we need to act decisively, and soon. We can no longer afford to sit around and let them take potshots at us. We need to reclaim our borders.”

Aiden grunts in almost reluctant agreement. “I actually agree with Tristen for once. We need a show of force.”

“A show of force, huh?” I mutter. I’m not so sure it’s that simple, but maybe they’re right. Maybe it’s time to change our approach and put them down once and for all. “Fine. We’ll each hold a pack meeting tomorrow evening and inform our people of the plan to seek out and eradicate the rogue threat once and for all. We’ll start with the border towns and work inwards, reestablishing control over our lands.”

My brothers nod, but I don’t feel like standing around and talking anymore, so I don’t give them a chance to say anything. “I’m outta here. Let’s get in touch after the meetings.”

I leave them talking. It’s late now, and I want to be back in town before morning. They seem more on the same page than when I arrived, but as I disappear down the trail, I hear the familiar sound of them bickering. Hopefully, they’ll go their separate ways before it ends in another fight. There was a time I’d have joined in, but now I can’t even find it in myself to do that.

Back on the dark trail to my pack, I subconsciously look for signs of her, a never-ending haunting I brought on myself and will suffer for the rest of my days.

Chapter 3 - Ava

Our escape from the cottage went smoothly. I was never locked inside. It wasn’t necessary, because the Collinses knew I had nowhere to go; being pregnant and then having Harper, I wouldn’t even risk it. Mr. Collins had made it very clear he’d find us wherever I ran; they knew I didn’t even have my wolf’s protection.

I hold Ava’s tiny body against me, willing her to stay quiet. At only fourteen months, she seems to have already learned when it’s dangerous to be too loud, something that breaks my heart when I think of how much she has endured already.

My resolve only grows the further we travel into the forest. I’m trying to stay off the main trails, walking in the direction of the coastline. All the ports are used to seeing visitors with all the regular trade going to and from the island, so we’ll be able to blend in better, and I can work out my next steps. The priority is finding somewhere warm for Harper to rest. The money I stole from the Collinses’ box in the kitchen weighs heavily in my bag. I know stealing it will only make them angrier, but I had no choice.

I try to focus on the trail ahead and not the burning in my arms from carrying Harper and our small bag for hours. The sun will be rising soon, and we’ll lose the cover of darkness. I can only hope we’re far enough away from the Collins house to give us enough of a head start.

Ava becomes more alert as we near the edge of the forest, her little head turning this way and that, taking in the sights and sounds around us. She’s never been this deep into the forest before and is clearly fascinated but also restless. The smell of pine and earth fills our lungs as we step out into a small clearing. I set Harper down gently, grateful for a moment’s rest and the chance for Harper to stretch her legs before she starts grumbling too much.

She immediately stumbles towards a small stream, reaching for the cool water. I watch as she splashes her hands, laughing joyfully. It's the most beautiful sound I've ever heard. She looks up at me, her eyes bright and curious, and I can see my reflection in them—a mix of fear and determination. "Mama, Mama, Mama," she chants, rubbing her hands together with delight.

I smile softly, leaning against a nearby tree. The bark is rough against my back but provides much-needed support. "Don’t get too wet," I laugh. "I’ll fill up our bottles."

I grab our empty bottles and crouch down next to her by the small stream, refilling them as Harper collects leaves, holding them up in the early morning golden light as though they are treasure.

The sound of rustling leaves behind us startles me, and I tense instinctively before realizing it's just a family of deer making their way through the underbrush. Their muted spotted coats blend perfectly with the colors of autumn leaves and soft morning light. Ava seems mesmerized by them, too. She reaches out her little hand toward them but doesn't take another step forward.

Relaxing again slightly, I release the breath I hadn’t even realized I was holding and pull out some bread from our bag, breaking off pieces for us to snack on. I know we can’t stay here long, but I can already feel my tired arms coming back to life. I just need a few more minutes.

Harper takes a bite of the bread, looking at me questioningly. "We're going on an adventure," I say, gently smoothing her blonde curls from her face. "To a place where the sun always shines, we can see the sea, and we’ll be happy together."

I feel the tears prickling my eyes, desperately wanting the words I’m telling her to be true. She seems to consider this before nodding seriously and scooping up another handful of leaves, not a care in the world. I’ll do anything to protect her innocence.

The wind picks up slightly, carrying with it a warning chill that sends shivers down my spine. I stand up quickly, grabbing Harper's hand. "It's time to go,” I say.

She seems unfazed as I adjust the bag and lift her into my arms. She’s not a tiny baby anymore, but a cheeky toddler who wriggles in my arms even though I will her to be still. I wish I was stronger, and I curse my wolf for abandoning me after Callum’s rejection. My wolf was never the strongest or fastest, but since she retreated into my soul, my strength has only faded more. The pregnancy and birth were hard on my body, and I needed her, but she never returned. Sometimes, I can almost feel her at the very edge of my subconscious, and I try to bring her forth, desperate for her return, but she slips away.

I could not carry easily Harper even if I had my wolf, but I would be stronger and know that I could defend her. The truth is, I feel like a failure. I cannot even protect my own daughter; I’ve allowed the Collinses to scare and threaten her. I vowed to be a better parent than my own ever were and love her more than any of the pack ever loved me, to give her a better life and show her what happiness really means.

And yet, here we are, alone and vulnerable in the forest, just hoping the Collinses won’t catch up with us, knowing I’m unable to defend us if that happens.

This is our only chance of escape—my only chance to keep Harper safe. I cannot fail her again.

The forest is coming alive now as daylight filters through the canopy of trees, illuminating the path before us. I feel slightly nauseous as I consider that our absence will have been noted by now. It’s my job to start the fires in the morning, prepare their breakfast, start the washing, and split new logs. I’m expected to be up and awake long before them, and they will definitely be awake by now. The house will be cold, and they will have come looking for me.

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