Page 14 of Call and Response

“What makes you think I don’t?”

“The way you keep brushing it off,” I countered, stopping to wait for the crossing signal. “And also the fact that you haven’t actually answered the question.”

His hand went to the back of his neck, squeezing like he was trying to soothe a sudden rush of tension as he shook his head. “I… honestly?”

“Please.”

He shrugged. “I don’t… I don’t know anymore.”

“Because you haven’t been able to get anything to pop off on your own… you’re taking it personal?”

He let out a bark of laughter as we crossed the street. “How do younottake it personal?”

“Well… I mean, the music that isn’t working… is it personal to you?”

“I wrote it.”

“That’s not what I asked though. I asked if it was personal to you. Like… meaningful. You poured your heart, your soul, everything into it and it flopped?”

“Uh… nah,” he answered, after giving it a moment of thought. “It’s not likethat.Hasn’t been. But it was good stuff.”

“Maybe for someone else.”

“What?”

“Maybe it was good stuff for someone else—not you. The music has to fit the person, the audience has to believe it, and they don’t believe…you.”

Hestopped this time, arms crossed over his chest. “What does that mean?”

“It means I listened to your solo stuff, and you’re right, it’s notbad,it’s just notyou.”

“You don’t know me.”

“But musically, Ishould,” I countered. “You went from that good toxic shit with Josiah to… music our grannies would approve of,” I explained. “And I don’t think that’s what you’re about. I thinkThe Cureis you. I think the song with Ky is you. But you want so badly to not be associated with Josiah and his bullshit that you’re not doing what actually works.”

“So toxic is the only thing that works now?” he scoffed. “I can’t accept that. I need to grow.”

“Thengrow… and take us with you. Show it. You can’t go straight from sneaky link tunes to twenty-fifth anniversary music.” I laughed, and after a moment, he did too. Then, I continued. “The transition period is important, and if I had to guess… I think that’s what you’re missing—that shift. Like… I know for a fact Josiah was on the exact kinda bullshit y’all were singing about in his real life. What about you?”

He sighed, shaking his head before he admitted, “I was writing from experience.”

“Okay.” I nodded. “But you’re not in a relationship now, you’re not in love, you’re not married… Why is the music about that then?”

“How doyouknow I’m not those things?”

I sucked my teeth. “Please,you’re way too surly for that.”

“Surly?”

I giggled. “That’s what I said. So… you figure out what space you’re in. Figure out how to articulate it. Andthat’swhere the music should be. Not ahead of it or behind it. And that’s where we’ll write from. Okay?”

His eyes narrowed a little, confused. “Uh… okay. I think.”

“Iknow.” I laughed. “My building is just right there,” I told him, pointing down the sidewalk from where we’d stopped. “You go home, get some rest… do some thinking. And in two days… we write. Cool?”

“Yeah, but… I need to walk you the rest of the way. I think I promised Winnie I’d make sure you went to bed.”

I sighed. “Noble… Winnie was insinuating you were gonna fuck me to sleep, so unless that was in your plans for tonight, I think I’ve got it from here.”

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