Page 35 of Beneath the Fame

“I hate to be weird,but…what are we doing?”

I looked up from lacing my shoes to find Vanessa standing at the door, fidgeting with the hem of the cropped hoodie from the outfit she’d found in the hotel’s online gift shop and had sent up to the room, along with everything else to make our “walk of shame” a little less…shameful.

Her hands moved from her hem to her ponytail, wrapping a coil of natural hair around her finger.

If I didn’t know better, I’d think she was a bitnervous.

Which was wild.

“What do you mean?” I asked, pushing myself to a standing position to amble over to her. “I thought it was pretty well established.”

She shook her head. “I don’t really do well with assumptions. Or…relationships, or whatever we’re calling this. Whatever it is. Are we just…fucking?”

“Does it seem like it?” I asked, prompting her to roll her eyes, but my question was serious. “I’m really asking—do you get the impression that sex is all I’m interested in with you?”

She cut her eyes away from me, unable to look me in the face as she shook her head. “No, but…wouldn’t that be a lot easier?”

“For who?”

“Forme, duh.” She laughed, finally bringing her gaze back to mine. “And for real…maybe for you too. I don’t like how people are saying I’m this terrible influence on you.”

“Why do you care?”

“Because it makes me think that…I don’t know. Maybe Iam.”

I pushed out a sigh as I hooked my arms around her waist, pulling her into me. “I’m a grown-ass man, Vee. I’m not that easily influenced, I promise you,” I told her. “And besides that…did you miss all those parts where I wasdefinitelythe one putting on all the pressure?”

“Yeah, but I’m the one with the sex tape and the hoe reputation.”

“AndI’mthe one who doesn’t give a fuck about any of that,” I countered. “I didn’t realize you were sweating it so much.”

She shrugged. “It’s a lot easier to ignore when it’s only aboutyou.Once other people are brought into it, andthey’regetting picked apart for simply being connected to you…yeah, it bothers me.”

“I can handle it.”

“You shouldn’thaveto handle it though, is the thing.” She sighed, then laid her head on my chest. “It’s not even that I can’t deal with people saying stupid shit, I just really don’t understand when they get souglyabout it. As if it’s personal, you know?”

I kissed the top of her head. “You’ve been doing this long enough to know what comes with it, gorgeous.”

She nodded. “I have. But the other guys…it was just…flings.Neither of us cared that much what people were saying because we didn’t really care abouteach othereither—not romantically, at least. It was easy to brush off. But this…this is different,” she explained, tipping her head up to face me. “I don’t want it getting…poisoned.”

“We don’t have to let that happen.”

“That’s easy to say, but…way harder to execute.”

I sighed. “I get it. I hope you know though, that I’m not letting any of this extra shit get in the way of what I think this could be. And I hope you share my curiosity.”

“I do,” she agreed. “I just…let’s protect it for now.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean…let’s not give the world any more of us than they’ve already gotten. At least for now, while we’re getting our bearings. Is that okay?”

I smiled, dropping my lips for a quick brush against hers. “Yeah. That’s perfectly fine with me.”

* * *

“Okay—wehaveto talk about this thing with you and Vanessa Kirkland.”