Page 61 of Sleepless Nights and Hockey Fights

“What are your thoughts on Freud?” I ask from the doorway of Coco’s office. She’s sitting at her desk jotting something down with a gold pen.

“I could never date a man so obsessed with everyone’s childhoods,” she replies without looking up.

I step closer and cross my arms. “He’s been dead for a hundred years, Coco.”

She finally looks up, bringing the pen to the side of her mouth. “I’ve always found the German language to be dreadfully guttural, haven’t you?”

This was clearly a mistake, so I laugh and turn to go. “I’d like to retract my question. I need to meet a client anyway.”

“Oh, goodness, you’re serious, aren’t you? Take a seat,” she commands. And, since I’m the one who invited this conversation, I do as I’m told and sink into the leather wingback chair across from her.

Coco pats her perfectly coiffed hair. “I’m sure Freud would have a field day with me and all my preferences andidiosyncrasies, but I could not care less what some old dead man thinks about me.” She points her pen at me. “And you shouldn’t either.”

“I know. I’m just . . . conflicted.”

“This is about Bobby Rhodes, I gather?”

It’s been a week since Bobby dropped the love bomb on me in his car—with his therapist! And I’ve spent way too much of the week examining my feelings and getting nowhere. When I’m with him, it’s so easy, so natural. I don’t overthink when we’re together.

It’s when I’m up in the middle of the night—that 2:36 a.m. witching hour—that my mind races with doubts. I’ve never been a leap-before-you-look person. I grew up with two parents who made it their life missions to fly by the seat of their second-hand pants, and I know the devastation that can come from that.

Spending Thanksgiving with Matty, Blake, and Luke didn’t help clear my confusion, either. Bobby was disappointed not to spend the holiday with Matty and me, but his team had away games before and after, so he was on the road. When Matty asked if I’d come with him to Blake’s for dinner, I couldn’t exactly refuse.

Watching Blake and Luke so happy together made me miss Bobby like crazy. But it also made my head spin with doubt. Blake and Luke make sense together. They’re close in age and economic status, and they have numerous interests in common. Luke even plays guitar like Blake.

Bobby and I, on the other hand? We have nothing in common, and he’s too rich and young. It would never work long term, no matter what my heart tries to tell me. Having developing L-word feelings for someone or being sexually compatible are not firm grounds to base an entire future on. Are they?

“He told me he loves me, Coco. What am I supposed to do with that?”

Her lips tip up. “Revel in it? Make him your sex slave? Say it back? Your pick.”

“It’s not that easy, and you know it.”

“It’s only as difficult as you make it, darling.”

“I don’t have the luxury of making mistakes. That’s like advising someone to go on a lavish vacation when they have no money in the bank and tons of bills to pay.”

“Love is free. And so is sex. All the best things are...except precious stones, of course. And cosmetic surgery.”

“Oh god, I’m so confused. I have no idea what I’m doing here. It was supposed to be a fun adventure, and now there are all thesefeelingsinvolved. And not just Bobby’s or mine. Matthew’s too.”

“Darling, you deserve to have a man fall head over heels in love with you. And so does Matthew.” She abandons the pen and folds her hands together on the desktop. “How do you feel about Bobby? What does your gut tell you when you’re not overthinking it?”

“I’m too busy overthinking it to figure that out!” I slouch in the chair in defeat. “I have such a good time with him, and he’s so kind and generous and funny. But I have to put Matty first, and what if Bobby justthinkshe loves me and figures out a month from now that it was only the novelty of it all? That a more age-appropriate woman suddenly looks more appealing?”

I huff out a frustrated breath. “And he wants to have babies, Coco.Babies.” I circle a finger over my belly. “My baby-making factory is having a going-out-of-business clearance event right now, and having a baby isn’t something you can just jump into because the window is closing.”

“Those all sound like what-ifs,” my boss replies.

“Speaking of what-ifs, what if he really does have an Oedipus complex and I find out I’m a dead ringer for his mom?! You know, part of the Oedipus complex is seeing other men as rivals and acting aggressively toward them. Did you know Bobby’s job with the Storm Chasers is picking fights with opposing players? Real fights, Coco! With punches and...and...fisticuffs!” My breathing is almost ragged now.

“Fisticuffs?! Oh my!” She clutches her pearls, and not in a metaphorical sense. She’s literally wearing a diamond and pearl necklace. But her tone drips with sarcasm.

“Coco.” I frown at her.

“I’m sorry. I couldn’t help myself. You sounded like my Grandmother June, and she’s been dead for thirty years.” She makes a shooing motion in the air before continuing. “Do you know what makes you a good realtor, Molly?”

“Learning from you?” I guess.

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