Page 74 of Annika's Aurora

“Three of four,” Logan mumbled.

“Come again?”

Logan lifted his head and met his boss’s angry gaze head-on. “Three of the four times she’s nearly died have been my fault.”

“What the hell are you talking about?”

Logan could sense everybody moving closer to listen. “First, there was the car accident that killed her brother, my best friend. I had been distracted by her because I was a horndog. She had given me a goodbye kiss, and it was all I could think about. I was looking at her in the rearview mirror when she screamed. If I hadn’t been distracted, maybe I could have prevented the accident.”

“That’s?” Logan held up a hand to stop whatever Graham was going to say.

“The second time was also my fault. I’d disappeared from her life, leaving her alone in her grief. She fought for years to fight her depression until she couldn’t anymore.

“You can’t know that’s because of you,” Emma said softly.

“I can, and I do. Her father found the letter she wrote to me before …” His voice cracked, and he attempted to clear it to continue. “And I quote, ‘You cut me open, slashed my heart to ribbons, then put me back together wrong.’”

“Fuck,” Finch cursed.

“I bet that’s not all she wrote,” said Emma.

He turned to her. “What?”

“I said, I bet that’s not all she wrote. What else did her letter say?”

“She talked about her grief for Jamie, how we both disappeared from her life. Her anger at me.”

“What else?”

“She wished me to live life, love, follow my dreams and crap like that.”

“What else?”Fuck.Why wouldn’t Emma leave this alone? She stepped closer to him when he didn’t answer. “What else, Logan?”

“She said she could have loved me,” he finally shouted. “Not that shedidlove me, only that she ‘could have.’”

“That’s because you didn’t give her the chance, just like now. You could have her love. A second chance at her love, and you’re fucking it up.” Emma certainly didn’t mince words. The Amazon warrior was fierce when she needed to be.

“What’s the third one?” Evan asked.

“Petersen.” It was all Logan needed to say. They had all been there for it. Knew the agony Logan had gone through searching for her. They’d all seen how very nearly she’d come to dying.

“Why are men such idiots?” Emma muttered.

“Hey, we’re not all idiots. Some of us learn from our mistakes. Look at the boss man here. He fucked up then fixed it,” Finch defended.

Graham stopped pacing directly in front of Logan. Reaching out, he smacked him on the back of the head. “Oww,” Logan cried, rubbing a hand over the back of his head.

“First of all, she might have been angry at you when she hurt herself, but I’m sure that was not the only thing she was feeling. She was probably under a lot of stress. She was in college then, right?” Logan nodded when Graham paused. “College can be stressful. And she may have never dealt with her grief properly. All those mitigating factors combined drove her to what she did. But she survived. And look at her now. What does her mom say? Heart of gold. She survived, and she thrived.

“Secondly, that accident could have happened to anybody. You guys were just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Even if you hadn’t been distracted by that lovely girl, and who could blame you, you probably wouldn’t have been able to avoid the accident. And from what I hear, you pulled her out of the car. You saved her life.

“And third, the only person to blame for what Petersen did to Annika is Petersen himself. Was it difficult to experience? Absolutely. Was the fear for her overwhelming? Most definitely. Should it have never happened? Undeniably. But she survived. She survived again because of you. You saved her.”

Graham paused, letting his words sink in. “Now, the way I see it, you have two choices. You can either let your insecurities and fears drive you away from the best thing in your life. Or you can come home with me and get your woman back.”

“It would help if you apologized to her for abandoning her for the last couple of days too,” needled Emma. He winced, knowing it had been an asshole move but unable to think past his guilt.

Logan thought about the last fifteen years without her and how dark and lonely his life had been. Then he thought about the last few weeks he’d spent with Annika and how her smile alone brought him so much light and love. There really was no contest.

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