Page 95 of This Vicious Dream

“Most people would.”

His eyes turn to slits. “You mean mostmenwould. Do not compare me to your previous human lovers.”

There aren’t many previous human lovers to compare him to, but I would never admit that to him.

“Fine, Calpharos, but if you don’t mind, I’d prefer to speak to Calysian at this moment.”

My tone is caustic, and surprise flashes across his face, followed by something that might be…uncertainty.

Regret immediately flashes through me. “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry.” Calysian has been…kind. When I close my eyes, I can still feel his arms around me, can still hear him murmuring in my ear, urging me to stay alive.

“I am the one who is sorry. I allowed you to be hurt. You almost died.”

“I think Kyldare is the one to blame for that.”

“No. The grimoire…engulfed me,” he admits, and something that might be shame flickers through his gaze.

It’s disconcerting to see Calysian as anything other than supremely arrogant.

“What was it like?” I can’t help but ask.

He sighs. “It was pure power. Even now I can feel the rush of it. I felt the horror and betrayal from the moment I was forced to split myself in such a way. And I knew I could make those responsible suffer. It was…”

“Addictive.” I know just how alluring vengeance can be. I also know how the flames of revenge will burn you alive if you let them.

But that won’t stop me from hunting Kyldare. And Vicana.

Calysian’s brow furrows. “I was so consumed by that power, I couldn’t even recognize you. I couldn’t protect you.”

My instinct is to snap at him that I don’t need his protection. But considering I’m still recovering from a hole in my chest, that feels like a lie. And it doesn’t improve my mood.

He studies my face. His eyelids are drooping—unsurprising after five days without sleep. That must be a strain, even for a god.

I shift over. “Lay down.”

Surprise flashes across his face, and he gives the narrow bed a pointed look.

“Go on,” I insist.

He doesn’t argue. I shift over to the wall, and he angles his huge body so he’s facing me. We’re so close, our bodies are almost pressed together, and I have a moment to regret the intimacy I’ve invited.

“You’re going after the next grimoire.” My voice is little more than a whisper, but Calysian nods, his eyes blurred with fatigue as they meet mine.

“I have to. The loss of what they took from me is an ache in my soul.”

It’s a surprising admission of vulnerability, and one that I doubt he would have made if he wasn’t already moments from sleep.

“I’m going with you.”

Calysian’s eyes sharpen. “Why would you do that?”

“Kyldare will hunt for that grimoire too. It’s on this continent, isn’t it?”

“Yes. What about your friends?”

“I will search for information about them at each town and city we visit. I can achieve two goals at once.”

He studies my face, and for a moment I’m sure he sees my true plans. But he must be even more exhausted than I thought, because he gives me a nod, his eyes sliding shut.

---