Page 86 of Wicked Sin

The kind of territory that can lead to charges of treason.

I pull out my phone and call McBride.

“How’s vacation?” she asks. Then laughs. “That never gets old.”

“I’ll return the favor the next time you pretend to take time off. Are you at the station?”

“I will be soon, just on my way back from the gym now. Ram is grabbing us dinner. We’ve taken over the conference room and are going to pull an all-nighter, going over all the murders from the beginning. See what we’ve missed.”

“Text me when you’re done in the morning. I’ll meet you for coffee on your way home.”

“Is everything okay?”

No. My whole world has been upturned. “It will be.”

When I hang up on her, I call my sister’s house. Everyone is there for dinner, and I just want to hear their voices for a second. A familiar chaos, instead of this out-of-control mess. “Ma,” my sister shouts as she answers the phone. “It’s your baby boy!”

She doesn’t even greet me, just hands over the phone.

“Luke,” my mother says in my ear, her voice warm and soft. “What is it?”

“Nothing, Ma. Just wanted to say hi since I couldn’t make dinner.”

“Are you on a case?”

No. Yes. Sort of. “It’s complicated.”

“What does that mean?” She laughs. “Is it a woman?”

Yes. No sort of about that. “Maybe, yes. I thought about bringing her to dinner, but it didn’t work out.”

“Maybe next week.”

Except she might be out of my life by next week. If everyone does their job, hopefully she will be.

And the restlessness in my chest gets worse.

The thought of losing Taylor disturbs me. Twists hard in my chest and threatens to shatter bones.

“We’ll see, Ma. I love you.”

“Love you, too.” She laughs as a kid climbs into her lap and demands the phone. “Uncle Luke has to go, baby. Next time.”

Next time. So many promises of next time. I’ve missed more family dinners than I’ve made over the years. Never really committed to any kind of relationship that would give me children, a spouse, a partner to bring with me on the regular. Someone who would get to know my family and learn to love/hate the chaos just like I do.

The call gets disconnected at the other end. I put the phone away and stare up at the late day sun, still hot on my skin.

Then I glance down the hill to my house—and see Taylor sitting in the backyard, watching me. I can’t even be mad at her for being outside when it’s daylight.

Fuck.

I stand up and wave, then make my way back down the path.

She’s backinside when I return, finishing the dinner prep I’d abandoned.

“I didn’t run away,” she says, keeping her back to me.

“It was my turn to do that.” I lean against the door jamb. “I’m sorry about grabbing you earlier. I shouldn’t haven’t have done that.”