Page 17 of To the Grave

“I’m sorry,” she said. “That you’re sad, I mean.”

I nodded and forced myself to swallow the rage bullying in my chest. I wanted to smack her, to wipe the self-righteous expression off her smug face. I wanted to scream, to rage, to leave and never look back.

“How are you liking college classes?” I asked, trying to steer the conversation to safer territory.

She lifted her chin like the fact that she was taking college classes at sixteen was no big deal even though I knew she thought it was a very big deal because she’d been talking foreverabout how young everyone was at Blackwell High and how she couldn’t wait to get a taste of college life. “Fine.”

Her phone buzzed on the table and she picked it up, then smirked at the screen before putting it down.

“Cool,” I said. “Your birthday looked fun. Did you have a good time?”

I knew from Ruth’s social media that she and a group of friends had gone to the city in a limo — courtesy of my dad, I assumed — and then to a club. They probably had fake IDs. Either that or Ruth had twisted some bouncer around her finger to look the other way.

I hadn’t been invited, which was just as well because clubbing was the very last thing I’d been in the mood for since Jace died.

Her eyes lit up. “So. Much. Fun. The city guys are just…” She smirked. “On a whole other level. I can’t wait to get out of this place for good.”

It was like watching a train wreck in slow motion. I could see it coming but there was nothing I could do about it.

“Just… take your time, Ruthie. You have your whole life to be a grown-up.”

“Jesus.” The shine in her eyes flattened and she picked up her bag. The disdain in her eyes was searing. “When did you get to be such a downer?”

I drew in a breath, willing myself to be calm. “I’m just looking out for you. Mom— ”

“You’re not Mom,” Ruth spat, standing to leave. “And nobody calls me Ruthie anymore.”

“Ruth…”

But it was too late. She was halfway to the door, and a few seconds later, she was gone.

Chapter 14

Daisy

Iwas still licking my wounds when I got up to leave the coffee shop twenty minutes later. It had taken that long to calm down after my conversation with Ruth, to replay it over and over again, looking for where I’d gone wrong.

She’d changed so much in such a short period of time. She was hardly recognizable as the kid who used to breeze into my room to raid my closet before school, the kid who’d begged me not to leave when I’d told her I was moving into the house at the top of the falls almost a year earlier.

Then again, I’d changed too. Did Ruth think it was for the better? Probably not, but I felt more like myself than I’d ever felt living under my dad’s thumb.

I took my cup to the counter, waved goodbye to Cassie, and wove my way through the crowd of people waiting for their orders. Then I stepped onto the sidewalk and almost ran smack into Honey, the beautiful curvaceous blonde member of the Blades who’d always been so nice to me at the compound.

“Oh my god!” I said, taking a step back. “I’m so sorry.”

Her eyes widened when she realized it was me. “Daisy! Oh…” She pulled me into her arms and I was enveloped in a cloud of sandalwood and an unusual scent I couldn’t quite place. “How are you, sugar?”

I pulled away. I’d avoided talking to members of the Blades MC when I’d been in town — it was too painful, too close to Jace and what had happened to him on the compound — but Honey was different.

“I’m…” I started to repeat the same platitudes I gave everyone at work:I’m fine.I’m good. But looking into Honey’s warm brown eyes, concern written all over her face, I just couldn’t. “I’m surviving.”

Her shoulders sagged with sympathy. “I’ve thought about you so much since the wake. I wanted to text but I didn’t have your number.”

“It’s okay,” I said. “I wouldn’t have made for good company.”

She scowled. “Who the fuck cares if you’re good company?” I laughed. “Seriously, anyone who expects you to be good company is an asshole. I just wanted to check on you, that’s all.”

“That’s nice of you.”

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