Page 20 of Controlling Natasha

“I think you should confront him.”

“I can’t.I’m not brave enough.”

“Youhaveto, Natasha.You can’t go on like this forever.You’re burning up for the man.You have to tell him the jig is up.Tell him you know he’s Daddying you.Force him to admit it.And then maybe take off your shirt.”

I gasp.“Not a chance in hell.”

“Gasp.Did you just use a cuss word?”

I roll my eyes.

“Seriously, though.Confront him.How many pairs of panties do you go through a day waiting on him to make a move?”

I ignore her silly comment about panties.The answer is embarrassing anyway.I often change my panties when I’m at home.They’re not comfortable when they get wet.Changing them makes me nervous, too, because I have absolutely no privacy.I don’t do my own laundry.Edith does it.I just hope the woman doesn’t tattle to Mr.Hoffman that I use twenty pairs of panties a week.

“What if I’m totally reading this wrong and he thinks I’m a lunatic?”

“You’re not.”

“What if he only sees me as a Little and not in a sexual way?I’d die of mortification.”I’ve read about this.I know some Daddy/Little relationships are not sexual.It’s possible Mr.Hoffman does Daddy me, but that’s all it is to him.

“What do you have to lose?”

“My housing?”

She cringes.“Yeah.I guess you’re right.There is that.You’d be too embarrassed to stay there if you found out the feelings were unrequited.”

I sigh.I can’t think of anything worse.

“So, here’s my idea,” Simone says.“Let’s go out tomorrow night.It’s a Friday.He can’t possibly tell you no.Then we’ll get home a few minutes after your curfew.It’s the best way to test the waters.When he reprimands you, that’s your segue.You can confront him and see what happens.You could say something like, ‘What are you, my Daddy?’”

I consider her idea.It could work.Or it could be the biggest mistake of my life.“There’s something else to consider.What if everything goes exactly how you’re suggesting?He confesses he’s a Daddy, tells me he wants to bemyDaddy, and even informs me he’d like to have sex with me.Then what?”I shudder.Am I prepared for what comes next?

“Then the fun begins, Natasha.Let that man Daddy you to death.Your life will be so fucking perfect, and I’ll be twice as jealous.”

I glance at my watch.“Yikes.It’s almost four.”I down the rest of my coffee and grab my bag.“Thank you so much for meeting with me.I mean it.You’re the best friend I’ve ever had.”

When we both stand, I hug Simone tightly.“One day, I hope Professor Arnalt sees how wonderful you are.”

She shrugs.“It’s a long shot.He’s twice my age.But you never know.Maybe I should ditch the goth look and try for sweet, angelic like you.”

I giggle.“Maybe.”After releasing Simone, I turn and jog out of the coffee shop.I’m not quite going to make it to the prearranged meeting spot by four, but surely Mr.Hoffman won’t find out I was a few minutes late.

Chapter6

Natasha

“I have plans tomorrow night,” I announce at dinner.I’m still jittery from the coffee, probably because I’m not used to having it.

Mr.Hoffman lifts a brow but doesn’t seem as surprised as I would have expected.“With Simone?”

She’s the only friend I ever mention, so it’s natural he would assume my plans are with her.Why am I so predictable?“Yes, Sir.”Ever since I learned about the subtle nuances of the word Sir, I’ve been intentionally using the word more frequently and putting a bit of emphasis on the S for good measure.I think he knows it because he flinches ever so slightly every time I use the word.

“Where are you two going?”

Shit.We didn’t come up with a specific plan.“I’m not sure yet.Maybe the movies.”

“How are you planning to get there?”He’s definitely speaking to me as if I’m twelve and he’s not one hundred percent on board with my plan.

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