Page 43 of Controlling Natasha

“Let’s go back to the deep submission he wants from you.Does that seem like a lifestyle you’re interested in?”

I think about his question for a minute and then nod.“Yes.I mean, I like how it makes me feel.”

“Tell me more about that.”

“Cherished, loved, important.I know he’s just being controlling when he tells me I have to be home by nine, but I like knowing someone gives a damn about where I am and that I’m safe.”

“Could it be there’s more to this than simply him being controlling when he has a driver take you places and enforces a strict curfew?”

“I guess it’s also because he’s worried about me.But those are really tight reins to have in place, even on someone much younger than me.Most people would rebel.”

“But you don’t rebel.”

“I guess I like it.I get a rush when he tells me to be at the curb by four to meet Albert, when he texts me to make sure I’m safe, and when he reminds me to be home by a certain time.It’s so dominant.So controlling.And it lights me on fire.”

“Sexually.”

It’s not a question.Quinten is simply verifying what I mean.My cheeks heat again.“Yes,” I whisper, looking down at my hands.

“Does that embarrass you, Natasha?”

“Yes.”

“You’re not alone.There are some people who enjoy age play and keep it completely separate from sex.Others find age play and sex weave all around each other at the same time, especially people who live in a twenty-four-seven dynamic.Even though you go to school, you still live mostly as Jameson’s full-time Little.He monitors you even when you’re in your adult headspace.He Daddies you constantly.How much of the time do you think his demands make you feel arousal?”

I purse my lips.

“There’s no right or wrong answer, Natasha.I’m not judging you, but I don’t want you to think your reactions to your Daddy Dom are in some way inappropriate.They’re not.”

That’s exactly how I feel.Naughty.And it’s delicious.But I can’t tell Quinten that.

“Would you say you feel aroused most of the time, Natasha?”

Finally, I nod without looking up.

“Does that make you feel bad?”

“Sometimes.I know it’s irrational.”

“It’s not irrational.It’s not even uncommon.Lots of people find submission titillating, and that’s why they crave it.When it’s full-time, like your arrangement, it can be frustrating to be constantly stimulated.”

“He won’t touch me until I’m certain I want to be his,” I murmur.

“That’s probably wise and responsible, Natasha.It will keep both of you from getting hurt if things don’t work out.”

I lift my gaze.Tears gather so fast I can’t stop them.“It’s way too late for that, sir.If things don’t work out, I would be just as devastated today as I would be if we were having sex.I think I’m in love with him.It’s so stressful because I’m not sure that’s how he sees me.”

Quinten gives me a warm smile.His next words are soft and kind as he hands me a tissue.“I haven’t asked Jameson if he’s in love with you, Natasha, but I can say it’s been a very long time since he’s had a Little girl.I suspect his overprotectiveness has something to do with a past experience, but I’ve never spoken to him about it.I do believe that someone who would be insistent about not adding a physical component to your relationship must think you’re pretty damn special.If you weren’t, he wouldn’t care about what adding sex might mean.”

I consider his words and nod as I wipe my eyes.

“It’s also rare for a Dom to call me and ask me to speak to a prospective submissive.It tells me you’re incredibly important to him.Don’t you think?”

“Yeah.”I force a smile.

He returns the smile.“I think we’ve covered a lot of topics today.What do you think?”

“Yes, sir.Thank you.I guess Mr.Hoffman and Professor Arnalt were right.”

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