Page 110 of The Truth About Love

He married her, that’s the important thing. He put a ring on someone else’s finger when he was supposed to be waiting for me. And that’s betrayal enough.

But she was pregnant.

I wish I could silence the voice in my head that reminds me of that fact. Because it’s so much easier to be angry with him for betraying me than it is to accept that he had a good reason for breaking my heart.

She was pregnant with his child, so he married her. It was the right thing to do. Or, at least, he thought it was. I’ve never been of the opinion that parents should be married for the misguided notion that their children will be better off even if the union is a miserable one, but I understand why Auden would be. After growing up with an absent father, of course he’d want to give his child as much security as he can offer.

But that doesn’t stop it hurting.

I might understand his decision, but it still tears me apart. I still hate him for it. And truthfully, I don’t think I’ll ever forgive him, but that doesn’t stop the guilt coursing through me that I let myself get lost in the kiss of another man.

For just a moment, I’d let myself believe it was Auden’s lips on mine. But reality had come crashing down the second Max slipped his tongue into my mouth. It didn’t feel right. Didn’t taste the way it should have.

I turn away from Max just in time to meet a pair of devastated blue eyes. Auden stands inside the elevator, staring right at me. Had he seen Max kiss me? Had he seen me push him away?

I’m frozen. My brain tells me to run to him but my feet stay rooted to the ground. All I can do is stare back at him with panic in my eyes as the elevator doors close and he rides it back up to his floor.

“He was watching.” Max shrugs with a sheepish grin. “I saw an opportunity and I took it.”

“Opportunity for what?” I swing my gaze back round to him.

“To fuck with your man a bit.”

My forehead creases in confusion as I blow out a frustrated sigh. “Why would you do that?”

“Didn’t you see how he was looking at me at dinner?”?I didn’t. Mainly because I was doing everything I could to avoid looking Auden’s way at all.?“It was like he wanted to kill me. You don’t have that kind of hatred for a man you don’t know unless you see him as a threat. Guess I wanted to exploit that. Provoke him a little, you know?”

“Jesus, Max. It’s not your place to do that. And besides, he’s married to Cara. He isn’t thinking about me at all.”

Though after the argument I had with Auden tonight, I’m not entirely confident in the truth of that statement.

Max chuckles. “Trust me, Summer, that woman might be wearing his ring but it’s not her he looks at like she’s the centre of his entire universe.”

My heart jumps at his words. Is that true? Does he really still look at me that way?

I shake myself clear of the thoughts. I can’t allow myself to wonder about stuff like that. It’ll only cause me more pain in the end. Because, no matter his reasons, he’s still married to another woman. And I can’t see how that’s going to change.

“Look, I appreciate you coming here with me tonight, I really do, but you had no right to do what you did. This was supposed to help me find closure, but it’s only made me feel worse. Because now I’m the one left feeling like I’ve done something wrong.”

He reaches for me but I flinch and his hands fall back to his sides. I don’t want him to touch me.

The taste of him is still on my lips and I itch with the need to scrub it off. If I was any other woman, I’d probably be elated to have had a man like Max kiss me the way he just did. But not me. His touch was too foreign, too unfamiliar.Wrong.The only way that kiss could have felt right was if Auden was the one who had given it to me.

And maybe that makes me pathetic, I don’t know. Frankly, I don’t care at this point. Because even though he legally belongs to another woman, my soul still knows that his heart belongs to me.

“Sum, I’m sorry.” Max hangs his head. “That wasn’t my intention at all.”

“You know what, it’s fine. Let’s just?”

I’m interrupted by my phone ringing. I pull it out, brow crinkling in concern when I see my sister’s name flashing on the screen. It’s almost eleven pm. She never rings this late.

“Summer?” Winter’s voice is shaky and solemn. “It’s Mom and Dad.”

***

Burying your parents is a strange thing to do when your feelings towards them are mostly fuelled by resentment. It feels wrong somehow, like I shouldn’t be the one to do it. Maybe one of their business colleagues or highbrow socialite friends would have been the better choice.

And yet, I find myself holding a fist of dirt over their shared grave anyway.

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