Page 122 of Can't Get Enough

“Um, yeah. A little.” I reach for the cup of coffee set by my plate, black the way I like it. “Probably just too much salt or something. It’s no big deal.”

I don’t want it to be a big deal. One of the first ways we knew something was wrong with Mama was her food. She’d always been the best baker for miles. I’ll never forget that first German chocolate cake that was just… off.

“I don’t understand.” Mama walks over to the stove, opening the cabinet where she’s always kept her spices. She pulls down the little white dish for salt. “I don’t taste any salt, but I know I used it.”

She pinches a little between her fingers and drops it onto her tongue. Her face freezes into a mask and she shoves the dish back in the cabinet. I’m surprised when she pushes past me and out of the kitchen.

“I’m not hungry, Hen,” she calls as she mounts the stairs. “Clean up the kitchen when you’re done, ’kay?”

When her bedroom door closes, I tiptoe over to the stove and pull out the salt dish. Looking furtively over my shoulder, I go through the same motions Mama did, pinching the salt and placing it on my tongue.

My face screws up at the unexpected taste. “What is that?”

Not salt, for sure. I taste again experimentally.

“Baking soda.” I close my eyes and sigh, slumping against the counter. “God, help us.”

I finish my breakfast quickly. I want to check on Aunt Geneva before I have to call in for my first meeting. They’re on Paris time, so they’ll be deep into their day. I need to look like I’m deep into mine, too.

I pad upstairs and down the hall, hesitating at Mama’s closed door, but then moving on. I know how self-conscious she gets when shemakes mistakes that remind her of how her brain is betraying her. I tap on my aunt’s bedroom door. The muted sounds of Kirk Franklin’s “Melodies from Heaven” make me smile.

“Aunt G,” I call softly. “You all right in there?”

“Come on in,” she answers.

Her surgery was a few days ago and she just came home yesterday. She’s on bedrest at least for the next three weeks, possibly longer. Abdominal hysterectomies have some of the longest recovery times, and considering her age, she has to take it easy and be really careful.

She’s propped up in bed, Velcro rollers in her hair, Bible on her lap.

“Morning.” I walk into the room and settle on her bed. “Did you sleep well?”

“It was kind of a rough night. I don’t want to take too many of those pills they gave me.”

“You had major surgery, Aunt G. Some pain is expected and taking meds to help manage it is okay.” I study her face, concerned by the faint lines of strain around her mouth. “Need help going to the bathroom?”

She grimaces. “I hate this, but I think I might.”

“Come on, young lady. Let’s get this over with.” I pull back the covers, help her to her feet and to the bathroom.

Once we’re done and she’s back in bed, she looks worn out.

“Thank you, Hen,” she pants, slightly short of breath even from that brief journey.

“Of course.” I get the covers settled back around her and fluff the pillows behind her head. “You all set? Need anything?”

“I probably won’t get around to it,” she says, “but hand me that big crossword puzzle book and my phone in case I get bored laying here on my back.”

I grab the hefty book from her dresser. I’ve seen her working on these more than once, pencil clenched between her teeth and brows drawn in concentration.

“I do ’em to keep this old brain of mine active.” She accepts the book and caresses the tattered pages. “I do Wordscapes on my phonesometimes, too. If I’m gonna get it, it’s probably too late to do anything about it now, but still…”

Aunt Geneva shrugs and looks up—searches my face for understanding.

Get it.Alzheimer’s.

I’ve thought of it, too. How can I not wonder if this thing that hunted Mama down later in life might one day come for me? Even if I didn’t have a relative diagnosed, Black people are almost twice as likely to develop Alzheimer’s. So, yeah, I think about it.

“I heard jigsaw puzzles are good, too,” I tell her with a smile. “And I started taking some new supplements. I think about it, but we’re gonna be fine.”

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