Page 34 of Can't Get Enough

“I wasn’t planning to worry about food,” I joke, but she knows I mean it. “I’d have homecooked meals delivered if necessary.”

“Well, thatwon’tbe necessary, Ms. Highfalutin’,” she laughs. “It’ll be good to have you home for a bit.”

I sober, wrapping my mind and my heart around the thought of being steeped in the reality of Mama’s condition every day. My chest goes tight, and my resolve wavers the tiniest bit. I know there is a lot I haven’t dealt with when it comes to this, but I’m afraid that if I let all that emotion out, I won’t ever be able to contain it again. It will run wild. I’m not sure I can do all the things I need to if that happens.

For some reason, and not for the first time, Maverick comes to mind. The rare understanding I found in his eyes Saturday night. The ease with which I voiced so many of the concerns about Mama that I’ve bottled up. He drew me out and into an openness I haven’t allowed myself with anyone. How do you articulate the ache of watching someone you love fade? It’s hard to put into words, and when I met Maverick, I didn’t have to. He already knew.

“I just wanted to check on you,” Aunt Geneva says. “And tell you about my surgery.”

“Thank you, Aunt G. Don’t worry.” I flop back onto my pillow and stare up at the ceiling as if the solutions to all my problems are sketched overhead. “I’ll take care of everything.”

CHAPTER 11

HENDRIX

No one’s looking at your coochie, Sol,” I laugh through a cloud of steam.

She has everything crossed to cover her nakedness. She’s crossed her arms, her legs. That girl crossed her heart. Yasmen and I are letting it all hang out and air out. There’s only one other woman in the steam room with us and she’s had her eyes closed the whole time. I think she’s fallen asleep.

“Well, I got it waxed just in case.” Soledad giggles, looking girlish with her face free of makeup and her hair curling riotously around her shoulders.

“Who waxesbeforethey come to the spa?” Yasmen asks, eyes closed and lips curved into a smile. She’s regal, her coppery brown skin glistening with sweat and her braids gathered atop her head. “You know they offer that as a service here.”

“Yes, but me and my man are the only people who get to see the bush in full bloom.”

“How is our hot accountant, by the way?” I ask, leaning back and crossing my ankles. “I haven’t seen Judah in forever.”

“It’s been bonkers for him at work.” Soledad grimaces. “There’s an audit he’s overseeing. And Aaron just started this new group for cubers.”

“Like Rubik’s Cube?” I ask.

“Yeah,” Soledad says. “We hope it encourages socialization. AndAdam is in this new programming club, and Judah’s been helping him navigate some of that. Like getting him some support at school.”

Judah, a dad of twin boys on the autism spectrum, is a perfect match for Soledad. They both love their kids fiercely. After all the shit her ex-husband, Edward, put her through, it’s amazing to see one of my best friends happy and finally being loved the way she deserves.

“Judah’s such a great dad,” Yasmen says, reaching for a small plastic cup of water.

“You both lucked out in the dad department,” I tell them, standing to pour eucalyptus oil over the sauna rocks. “Not Edward, though, Sol. He wont shit.”

Soledad snort-laughs and spits out a little of her water. “Agreed.”

“Amen,” Yasmen joins the joke.

“You guys still thinking about fostering, Yas?” Soledad asks, wiping the water from her face.

“I don’t think so.” Yasmen rests her chin on the knees pulled up to her chest. “We just got things on track for the kids. Hell, with each other. We’re gonna hold here for a little bit and let the dust settle on our little family.”

She looks between the two of us, a sad smile on her pretty face. “My therapist and I have concluded that longing for another baby may have stemmed from something I wanted to fix or make right for Henry.”

Yasmen and her husband, Josiah, have been through a lot the last few years—losing his aunt who raised him, losing their baby Henry very late in Yasmen’s pregnancy, financial struggles with their restaurant Grits, divorce, and then reconciling and remarrying. Yeah, letting the dust settle is probably a good choice.

The one other woman in the sauna stands, naked as the day she was born, and walks out without a word. Perfect timing because I wanted to broach the subject of what happened in Miami, but not with another set of ears present.

“Now that we’re alone,” I say, leaning forward to rest my elbows on my knees. “There’s something I wanted to get your perspective on.”

“Wait.” Soledad stands, strategically covering the girly parts with her hands, and reaches for a towel. “I accepted your damn dare, but I cannot have a serious conversation with my nipples and snatch out.”

“Pass me a towel, too.” Yasmen casts me a sheepish look. “I was determined to outlast Sol. I love y’all, but sitting around naked with you for the last ten minutes is a new level of bonding.”

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