Page 19 of Deeper

Victoria smiled, proud of me, accepting my sexual conquest. “How was it?”

An image of Zander taking me hard caused me to scratch at my neck and breathe out. “I h-had a good time.”

“So you came?”

The first round, the second round, and okay, even during that last round when we were both winding down from our sexual high. “More than once.”

Victoria’s eyes lit up and she high-fived me. “Yes for female orgasms!”

I managed to loosen up and laugh. “Fuck yes to female orgasms!”

“Did you suck it?” she asked scandalously as she settled down.

My not meeting her gaze gave her the answer.

“Oh my God, Bianka!” she chastised me as she swatted at my naked knee. “You do not give your best sex to strangers. You know what, it’s fine, you were in a hotel, and hotels were made for that life.”

“This was my first one-night stand, give me a break,” I joked.

She eyed me funny. “Did he at least return the favor?”

I felt myself grow hot. “Yes, and he could teach a class on it.”

She softened up. “Well, what did he look like? Light skin, brown skin, dark skin, tall, short, buff, thick, skinny—what?”

I laughed at her inquisition. “He wasn’t even Black.”

Shit.

Maybe he should’ve been to keep up with the ruse.

Victoria’s eyes enlarged and she was quick to set her coffee down. “Oh, dear God.”

Like Victoria, I simply admired and dated Black men. This encounter was a first on many levels. But when it came to Zander, much like how Victoria viewed him, his racial background wasn’t a big deal. He was attractive, talented, sexy, and fucked me better than anyone before him.

I got sad at that last fact. How could I tell Victoria that the best sex I’d ever had in my life was with a guy she was obsessed with? “Yeah.”

“Whatwas he? Besides delicious, I hope,” Victoria prodded on.

Only Victoria. “He was…human, and that’s all that matters.” To give her a little something, I feigned confusion on the rest. “Maybe part Asian, I’m not sure, but he was fine as hell and confident. He carried himself in this way that he knew he was the shit, but he wasn’t arrogant.”

“Damn, hope you got his number.” Victoria bit into a cream stick and was back in her phone.

I did have Zander’s number, but I couldn’t continue to text him or see him again. “Anyway, thanks for waking me up. I got some place to be and now I’m going to be cranky.”

Victoria leaned back and looked upside down at the calendar on the wall by my ancient landline I didn’t use. “Shit, it’s that time of month already?”

My mood lessened as I nodded. “Yeah, I guess the sooner the better, huh?”

Victoria frowned, coming and throwing her arms around me. “I’ll always be your family, Bia, don’t question it.”

Family. Such a tough topic for me, and Victoria knew why. She offered, as she often did, to come with me on my journey, but like I always did, I turned her down.

After she left, I got dressed properly, combed and fixed my hair, then got behind the wheel of my Nissan Sentra and drove twenty minutes south to Lindenwood, my city and origins, to visit my father like I did every other week.

I arrived and parked my car in the same spot I always did, out in front of the familiar powder blue house with the bright colorful flowers in the flowerbeds by the front porch.

Being home always made me fall back to before, of what I both loved and hated about this house.