Page 96 of Deeper

If only it were that easy.

Maybe it could be, if I just took a chance.

“Okay.” I wiped my eyes on my arm, leaving behind smeared mascara. “I need you to promise me something, and after that I’ll let my guard down and I’ll be all in this with you. I’ll give youallof me.”

Zander braced himself. “Done. What is it?”

“When you know deep in your heart that it’s over, and you don’t want me anymore, you’ll look me in the eye and let me know,” I said. “I don’t want to find out on a blog or social media. I want you to tell me to my face when it’s over.”

Zander frowned, staring down at the carpet as he slowly and solemnly managed to nod his head. “I will. Promise me the same? Or do I even have to ask?”

“I’ll let you know.”

Zander peered back up at me. “As for now?”

“I want you, this, everything, so long as you’re along for the ride.”

The sight of his smile eased up my mood and the feel of his arms soon taking me in against him let me know it was okay to trust him, to fall freely and not worry about the consequences.

His full lips captured mine and I gave mine up to him.

“I would say let’s sleep on it, but it feels like someone is squeezing my uterus right now,” I joked.

Zander eyed me, catching my meaning. “Need anything?”

I shook my head. “Pamprin and Chill sounds like a good mood for me.”

Zander opened his mouth, but the sound of knocking at the door had him chuckling. “I’ve gotta get to the studio. We should talk about the move-in date later.”

Right, because I agreed to live with him. I wasn’t sure if I would wait the sixty days, or just chuck up the deuces now and pack my bags, save the rent money and move to Beverly Hills. It was a lot to think about.

“I’ll let you know when I’m ready,” I said.

Zander nodded, not wanting to push me any further. He went and answered the door, pulling it open and revealing Victoria standing behind it.

Her eyes landed on Zander, her biggest celebrity crush of all time, and enlarged at once. Joy and glee didn’t take her. She couldn’t have her dream guy becauseIwas already with him.

“Victoria, yeah?” Zander was nice enough to hold his hand out, wanting to shake properly.

Tori’s attention fell to Zander’s tattooed hand and she merely shook her head. “Nice to meet you, Zander.”

Zander turned back to me, understanding what this all meant. “I’ll call you later.” He excused himself out of the apartment and let Victoria in on his way out.

Victoria, despite a little sullenness after seeing Zander, was radiant in her bright colors of blue and yellow. The blue eyeliner she’d used made her makeup really come together.

It had been too long since I’d seen Tori. “Hey.”

She made no effort to move, but merely lifted her chin at me. “You two look like you were going through it.”

I shrugged. “It’s me. I’ll always ruin a good thing if you let me.”

My best friend perked a finely shaped eyebrow. “You dated a few assholes, Bianka. Don’t take credit for their faults and issues.”

“I’m difficult,” I argued. “Zander sees it, and he wanted to talk.”

This Victoria didn’t deny as she finally set her purse down and went and sat on my couch, waiting for me to join. “Yeah, there’s that.” She propped her arm up on the back of the couch and rested her head, eyeing me with disappointment. “You have an amazingly talented and attractive guy and you’re being difficult?”

“Can we focus on us first?” I didn’t need another lecture about letting my guard down.

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