Page 112 of Deeper

I heard the front door shut out in the living room. The clunking of Victoria’s shoes announced her arrival moments before she poked her head in my doorway.

“Hey—” She stopped, taking in the position I was in with Zander’s arms around me in the middle of my floor. Victoria made no attempt to come further into my bedroom. “Hang a scrunchie on the door next time, will ya?”

“Tori, we’re not doing anything,” I said.

Victoria wrinkled her nose. “Oughta make it a house rule that you can’t.”

“Hello, Victoria,” Zander said cheerfully, trying for friendly.

At once the angst dissolved. “Hey, Zander.”

“It’s nice to see you again.”

Victoria wasn’t interested in the pleasantries. She grabbed the doorknob, prepared to leave us be. “Well, at least you’re better than Rod.” She sized Zander up boldly. “He was never any good to her. Keep that in mind, because if you hurt Bia,I’llhurtyou.”

“Yikes,” Zander said as he winced. “I thought you were my biggest fan.”

Tori snuck him a clever look before she dipped out of the room. “Not when it comes to Bia.”

She let the threat and warning hang in the air as she closed the door behind her. Zander peered at me and I shrugged. Tori was my best friend and I was down for her the same.

“You are aware that you’re the reason we’re in this mess, right?” I questioned as I took my sketchbook back and returned it to my nightstand.

Zander was confused. “How so?”

“You hurt her when you cancelled the show, so out of love for my best friend I went looking for you to call you out,” I said. “I was riding for her like she rides for me, so in a way, us being together is all on you.”

“Then I have no regrets for what I’ve done.”

It was funny, neither did I.

I was still tired from being up all night so I put on some music and got on my bed. Zander lay back between my legs as I braided the top of his head, trying a new look out of boredom. It was just us, in our little world where no threat could get to us.

“By the way, speaking of ‘Xs,’ nice tattoo,” I mentioned, almost forgetting he’d gotten new ink while in New York.

Zander angled his head, trying to peek up at me. “How’d you know about that?”

I bit my lip, my ego taking a hit. “I…followed you on all your socials.”

His dark brows shot up towards his hairline. “Really? What’s your handle? I’ll follow you back.”

It was in his doing this that his fans would find me out. Was I ready for that kind of exposure? Who was I kidding, come Saturday night, the world would know who I was after being photographed officially and formally on Zander’s arm.

Before I could second-guess my photos and tweets, I coughed up my info as if it were no big deal.

Zander gathered his cell phone and quickly followed me.

Paying it no further mind, I went back to his hair and Zander relaxed into me, allowing the lyrics of classic LL Cool J to fill the room. Times like this, being together and just connecting one-on-one, when it was all so simple, would be fleeting when he was on the road.

“Can I ask you something?” I said, breaking the silence.

“What’s up?”

“For the tour, are you going to dance or do a routine?” I wondered.

Zander made a face. “My biggest love from the So What days was how chill and laid-back we were allowed to be. We were five guys who didn’t know how to dance to save our lives, and we weren’t about to go out there and make fools of ourselves. We literally went out and had fun being ourselves, and that’s what I want for my stage. I’m not interested in the theatrics of dancing and learnin’ a two-step.

“We’re talking about incorporating lights to make it vibe, but generally I want a chill setting where you can just come and listen tome. I wanna play piano and maybe guitar, but no, I’m not a performer like that.”

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