Page 66 of The Best of Us

Yeah, tell me about it.

“Well, um, how’s she making you crazy?”

By simply existing and not being mine.I kept that thought under lock and fucking key. “She dared to suggest I might feel obligated to be with her because we share a son.”

“Well, duh.”

“I beg your finest pardon.”

“Come on, you know it’s true. Don’t lie to me, yourself, or to her.”

I had to stand for this. “What are you saying?”

“You’re the most self-sacrificing person in the world. Of course you’d consider taking care of both her and Colin. Step in as a fatheranda husband. You’d see it as the right thing to do. I’m a little surprised a stranger could get a read on you that well, but I don’t disagree with her for thinking that.” Before I could denounce that insanity, she said, “Not that I believe you should do that. That’d be a disservice to you both to marry for the sake of an obligation.”

I was going to eviscerate that word from the dictionary. I didn’t care the cost. I’d make it happen.

“You need to separate your honor from your heart, so you know which one is leading you.”

I didn’t need to separate shit, because I knew damn well what I was feeling. I went to the vanity and took a moment to splash some water on my face.

I turned off the faucet. “I wouldn’t marry her out of obligation, not even to make our son happy. And even if I was crazy enough to suggest such a thing, why would she want to be with me?” Before I allowed her to respond to what I’d meant as a rhetorical question, I unintentionally tossed out one of my fears, “She’s going to push me away.”

“Because she’s scared of getting hurt. Sounds like you both have that problem in common.”

I took her off speakerphone and went into my bedroom.

“Important side note: two people who don’t have genuine feelings for each other wouldn’t be so worried about getting hurt.”

I dropped onto the bed, resting my elbows on my thighs. I couldn’t believe I was opening up like thisagainand coming to my sister for advice. This had always been a no-fly zone for me in the past. I didn’t even talk like this with Hudson.

“You didn’t spend a lot of time with each other back then, but it’s obviously clear you two left a lasting impression on one another.”

She had no idea how much this woman had impacted me. “Let’s just go back to talking about this new case.”A case now involving my son.

“You sure?”

“Yes,” I groaned in frustration.

“Well, there’s nothing else to discuss for now. We’ve got eyes on their hotel door. The second they leave, or if anyone new shows up, I’ll call you. I mean, unless you want to go question them today?”

“No, not yet. I need to know what we’re dealing with and how much of a problem they might be first.”

“Then, in that case, maybe sleep for real this time.”

“I’ll try.” I shifted onto the bed to lie down, fatigue finally catching up with me.

“Before you go, any idea when you plan on telling Mom and Dad about Colin? Alessandro and Enzo?”

I held the phone to my ear while resting my head on the pillow, shutting my eyes.

I was close to my brothers, always had been. But, selfishly, thinking about Enzo with his newborn twins and Alessandro with a baby on the way made me jealous. Jealous I missed out on my son’s birth and his entire life. I wasn’t sure if I could talk to them without feeling like a shitty human for harboring so much envy.

“I don’t know. When Colin is ready to meet them, I guess. I don’t want to keep this from them for long.”

“Thank God.” She sighed. “You know my lips are sealed, but I’m not exactly Fort Knox over here regarding secrets.”

“Yeah, don’t I know it.”

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